scans_daily: In honor of the Superbowl: SuperPro!

proteus_lives (

scans_daily,
@ 2010-02-07 11:47 pm UTC

Current location:	Outer Dark
Entry tags:	creator: fabian nicieza, publisher: marvel comics

In honor of the Superbowl: SuperPro!

Greetings True Believers! I got off early from the work to watch the SB with some friends. (For all the good it did me, goddamned Saints.) I thought I'd make myself feel better by posting one of Marvel's great, late and unlamented series: NFL SuperPro!

It is perhaps the worst Marvel comic of all time. I'm glad I own an issue of it. Enjoy! For this is crack and it's what we're here for!

Suggested tags: char: superpro, title: superpro, creator: fabian nicieza, publisher: marvel comics

The plot does not matter. Something about a crime boss, game fixing and the NFL. Just roll with it!

This dude is trying to kill another dude.

Football pun, hooray!

Dude is shot by another dude. SuperPro gives chase and......cameo!

Gratuitous thy name is Spidey.

And he has a wise black friend!

The origin of SuperPro!

Some assassins go to kill a NFL player, SuperPro leaps into action!

Oh, man I wish I had #2. Quick Kick was a placekicker turned ninja. It's crazy, reading through the whole thing is like trying to solve the Lament Configuration or saying Candyman five times in the mirror. It's dangerous.

If anyone has other issues, please post them!

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	no subject worldwillshout 2010-02-08 05:30 am UTC (link)
	I actually own this comic. The sad thing. I got it from a back issue bin as a child cause I thought it looked cool. (Reply to this)

	no subject akodo_rokku 2010-02-08 05:42 am UTC (link)
	Nobody ever believes me when I tell them about Superpro. That's probably for the best. (Reply to this)

	no subject shanejayell 2010-02-08 05:50 am UTC (link)
	Wow. So did Marvel have to pay to use the NFL logo, or did the NFL phone marvel up with 'We've got an idea for a tie in comic....' (Reply to this) (Thread) (Hide 1 comment) (Show 1 comment)

	no subject freezer 2010-02-08 07:36 am UTC (link)
	It was a joint Marvel/NFL project. Interesting thing is Pro Set made a Superpro trading card which worth about twenty times what the comic is. (Reply to this) (Thread from start) (Parent)

	no subject queenanthai 2010-02-08 06:10 am UTC (link)
	WOOOOOOOOO SAINTS!!!!!! (Reply to this) (Thread) (Hide 6 comments) (Show 6 comments)

	no subject proteus_lives 2010-02-08 06:20 am UTC (link)
	Bah I say! Bah! (Reply to this) (Thread from start) (Parent) (Thread) (Hide 5 comments) (Show 5 comments)

	no subject queenanthai 2010-02-08 10:59 am UTC (link)
	LOL PWNED (Reply to this) (Thread from start) (Parent) (Thread) (Hide 4 comments) (Show 4 comments)

	no subject proteus_lives 2010-02-08 11:15 am UTC (link)
	This time! The Saints played a great game but if that goddamned interception hadn't happened it would been OT and a Colts victory. (Reply to this) (Thread from start) (Parent) (Thread) (Hide 3 comments) (Show 3 comments)

	no subject kainnived.livejournal.com 2010-02-08 11:38 am UTC (link)
	If they hadn't have lost they totally would have won man. (Reply to this) (Thread from start) (Parent) (Thread) (Hide 2 comments) (Show 2 comments)

	no subject punishermax 2010-02-08 06:15 pm UTC (link)
	Hey be nice the Colts had to put Manning on suicide watch after that game. God I am tired. Of the announce team blowing him every god damn game. (Reply to this) (Thread from start) (Parent) (Thread) (Hide 1 comment) (Show 1 comment)

	no subject proteus_lives 2010-02-08 07:01 pm UTC (link)
	They probably do that because he's one of the greatest of all time. (Reply to this) (Thread from start) (Parent)

	no subject silverzeo 2010-02-08 06:45 am UTC (link)
	Oh what fun Deadpool will have with this man.... You know, after watching the NC's review of battlefield Earth... I realized... Thundercats Dogs of War was just like it. (Reply to this) (Thread) (Hide 4 comments) (Show 4 comments)

	no subject box_in_the_box 2010-02-08 07:03 am UTC (link)
	Actually, and I can't believe I'm defending Battlefield Earth, but I don't recall it featuring a scene where a barely-legal, barely-clothed Wilykit is mind-controlled by Mumm-Ra and bathes him, which I do recall being a scene in the Ford Gilmore-written comics. (Reply to this) (Thread from start) (Parent) (Thread) (Hide 1 comment) (Show 1 comment)

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silverzeo
2010-02-08 02:40 pm UTC (link)

No, that's Thundercats: The Return. The way Wilykit appears at the start of this "saga" he looks like a savage "man-animal." Dogs of War is the one with the somewhat stupid alien overlords, who somehow manage to conquer countless other planets, are easily defeated by their band of slaves, the Lizardians (sp?) who could have easily put an end to them at anytime, but simply chose to wait until they set their eyes on their messiah...

(Reply to this) (Thread from start) (Parent)

	no subject proteus_lives 2010-02-08 07:26 am UTC (link)
	Oh, SuperPro would be perfect for an issue of Deadpool Team-Up! (Reply to this) (Thread from start) (Parent) (Thread) (Hide 1 comment) (Show 1 comment)

	no subject silverzeo 2010-02-08 02:41 pm UTC (link)
	You think DP will ask him for season tickets? (Reply to this) (Thread from start) (Parent)

no subject

box_in_the_box
2010-02-08 07:01 am UTC (link)

These scans make this comic look much, much better than it actually was.

Seriously, this was some shithouse storytelling, enough to earn this title a mention as one of the worst comics ever made, alongside Street Poet Ray, a comic book so indefensibly awful that even Kurt Busiek, The World's Nicest Human, calls it complete crap.

None of this is to discourage you from posting more scans. Like Jack Chick, these are so jaw-droppingly bad that they must be shared and inflicted upon others. :)

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	no subject cleome45 2010-02-08 07:16 am UTC (link)
	Do you have that list somewhere? I need to see how many of the, er, "winners," I've actually read and/or owned. (Reply to this) (Thread from start) (Parent) (Thread) (Hide 11 comments) (Show 11 comments)

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box_in_the_box
2010-02-08 07:21 am UTC (link)

I actually just now tried to find it, and I'm starting to suspect it was on Geocities or Angelfire, because I'm getting a lot of dead links. :(

The list included NFL SuperPro, Street Poet Ray, the issues of Power Pack where they turned the book grim-and-gritty, and the Hulk annual where the entire story centers on the Hulk attempting to rape She-Hulk.

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	no subject proteus_lives 2010-02-08 07:31 am UTC (link)
	"and the Hulk annual where the entire story centers on the Hulk attempting to rape She-Hulk." Oh great, now I might have to re-post that! ;) (Reply to this) (Thread from start) (Parent) (Thread) (Hide 6 comments) (Show 6 comments)

	no subject box_in_the_box 2010-02-08 07:34 am UTC (link)
	Dude, on THIS comm? You KNOW you have to! That was one of those stories where I literally looked at the page and said out loud, to an empty room, "I DID NOT JUST FUCKING READ HULK-ON-SHE-HULK RAPE-FIC PUBLISHED IN CANON BY MARVEL." (Reply to this) (Thread from start) (Parent) (Thread) (Hide 5 comments) (Show 5 comments)

	no subject proteus_lives 2010-02-08 07:47 am UTC (link)
	Ha! I'll dig it up tomorrow after work and post it. Watch for it! (Reply to this) (Thread from start) (Parent) (Thread) (Hide 4 comments) (Show 4 comments)

	no subject box_in_the_box 2010-02-08 07:49 am UTC (link)
	Poor Paul Jenkins. He's a very nice man who told some great Spider-Man stories, but ... Jesus. (Reply to this) (Thread from start) (Parent) (Thread) (Hide 3 comments) (Show 3 comments)

	no subject proteus_lives 2010-02-08 07:58 am UTC (link)
	He has done some great Spidey stories. The Hulk annual has the feel of he thought it was a great idea at 3am the night before. (Reply to this) (Thread from start) (Parent) (Thread) (Hide 2 comments) (Show 2 comments)

	no subject box_in_the_box 2010-02-08 08:01 am UTC (link)
	To be fair, this was when Marvel was in its Fuck It We'll Get Jenkins To Fix Everything Byrne Fucked Up mode, and I think it spread him a bit thin. (Reply to this) (Thread from start) (Parent) (Thread) (Hide 1 comment) (Show 1 comment)

	no subject proteus_lives 2010-02-09 04:42 am UTC (link)
	Posted it! Enjoy the crack! (Reply to this) (Thread from start) (Parent)

	no subject cleome45 2010-02-08 03:01 pm UTC (link)
	Well, I was lucky enough to not own those, and the only one I even actually heard of was Street Poet Ray. However, I did once own several issues of US1-- just in case that earns me any anti-cred in this thread. :D (Reply to this) (Thread from start) (Parent)

	no subject foxhack 2010-02-08 08:06 pm UTC (link)
	Tried feeding those old addresses into the Wayback Archive? I've found a lot of old Geocities sites archived there, dude. (Reply to this) (Thread from start) (Parent) (Thread) (Hide 1 comment) (Show 1 comment)

	no subject box_in_the_box 2010-02-08 08:13 pm UTC (link)
	Good suggestion. Thanks! (Reply to this) (Thread from start) (Parent)

	no subject proteus_lives 2010-02-08 07:29 am UTC (link)
	Oh, it was awful, the plot holes were big enough to pilot the Galactica through. But I do admit a certain affection for it. Jack Chick is a good comparison. Both of them should be kept on file for their wonderful crack and as a warning from history. (Reply to this) (Thread from start) (Parent) (Thread) (Hide 4 comments) (Show 4 comments)

	no subject box_in_the_box 2010-02-08 07:32 am UTC (link)
	The one "fan" page for it that I can no longer find online was fucking hilarious for how much it detailed the WTF plot points. It was like the book's concept was storyboarded by a room full of people with head injury traumas. It made Chuck Austen look coherent. (Reply to this) (Thread from start) (Parent) (Thread) (Hide 3 comments) (Show 3 comments)

	no subject proteus_lives 2010-02-08 07:49 am UTC (link)
	Fabian admitted he did to get free NFL tickets and he's been rightfully taking flack for it ever since. (Reply to this) (Thread from start) (Parent) (Thread) (Hide 2 comments) (Show 2 comments)

	no subject box_in_the_box 2010-02-08 07:49 am UTC (link)
	Everybody has their off-moments, I suppose. (Reply to this) (Thread from start) (Parent) (Thread) (Hide 1 comment) (Show 1 comment)

	no subject sarno001 2010-02-08 05:06 pm UTC (link)
	"Off-moments"? Dude, free NFL tickets! Good on him! He could have written Superpro as a Dallas cheerleader that gained her powers through experimental testosterone supplements in an effort to draw attention to the plight of women's football players and I'd support this. Throw in a slice of apple pie and you've got yourself a true all-American comic! (Reply to this) (Thread from start) (Parent)

	no subject jcbaggee 2010-02-08 08:16 am UTC (link)
	I'm busy the next few days (and, well, have never scanned anything before -- I use other people's scans usually >_>) but I've got issue #2. I'll try to scan it. (Reply to this)

	no subject psychopathicus_rex 2010-02-08 09:09 am UTC (link)
	Oy yoy yoy yoy yoy. Every time I look at that outfit, it gets stupider and stupider looking. News flash, Mr. Superpro - those shoes and that helmet look stupid on people who are PLAYING THE ACTUAL GAME. They should NOT be worn by someone who is NOT playing the game. (Reply to this)

	no subject iondan 2010-02-08 09:48 am UTC (link)
	I have never watched a Superbowl in my life, Though I did watch Paul mccartney's half-time show that one year. (Reply to this) (Thread) (Hide 2 comments) (Show 2 comments)

	no subject proteus_lives 2010-02-08 10:18 am UTC (link)
	Your Toyota icon gives me a sinful giggle. (Reply to this) (Thread from start) (Parent) (Thread) (Hide 1 comment) (Show 1 comment)

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iondan
2010-02-08 10:38 am UTC (link)

It's sort of reworked from a comment I saw on an article about a guy who ran his Tundra into a dealership and blamed his pedal. The original had a wolf and was worded different, I thought it was chuckle worthy.

For whatever record though my mom's got a Matrix and it's an good car so I don't really have anything against Toyota. I actually feel really bad for their CEO, a lot of this mess was his predecessor's fault.

(Reply to this) (Thread from start) (Parent)

	no subject punishermax 2010-02-08 10:55 am UTC (link)
	Peyton Manning looked a little like Damien from the Omen as the Colts started to implode. Also, the Saint's better send him a nice gift basket for his help in winning the game for them (Reply to this) (Thread) (Hide 1 comment) (Show 1 comment)

	no subject proteus_lives 2010-02-08 11:14 am UTC (link)
	To Reggie Wayne actually, he was the one who fucked up. (Reply to this) (Thread from start) (Parent)

	no subject iskander 2010-02-08 03:09 pm UTC (link)
	Aw, no posted "Kickers Inc". (Reply to this) (Thread) (Hide 1 comment) (Show 1 comment)

	no subject icon_uk 2010-02-08 04:13 pm UTC (link)
	Yeah, I wondered if anyone was going to mention them! :) (Reply to this) (Thread from start) (Parent)

	no subject tacobob 2010-02-08 03:24 pm UTC (link)
	Sorry Spidey, I don't think Super-Pro is going to be on the front page. (Reply to this)

	no subject orisitlove.livejournal.com 2010-02-08 03:46 pm UTC (link)
	Worst comic? Sounds like people are forgetting about Marville. (Reply to this)

	no subject halloweenjack 2010-02-08 05:30 pm UTC (link)
	Didn't Garth Ennis write this? Ut, sorry, wrong Pro. (Reply to this)

	no subject halialkers 2010-02-08 06:19 pm UTC (link)
	As someone from Louisiana I am quite content that the Saints won. WHO DAT! As to the comic-ROFLMAO. (Reply to this)

no subject

mcity
2010-02-09 05:10 am UTC (link)

I knew this was worse than my 10-year old self thought it was, but I never stopped to consider how a sniper misses the presence of a six-foot man in brightly colored NFL duds right in front of him.

I mean, the lawsuit from the NFL alone for unauthourized logo usage would put him out of business in about a week. And why is he expositing to the assassin? And why do you need a killer on the ground if you already have a sniper?

http://i345.photobucket.com/albums/p388/proteus_lives/Scan11483.jpg
When I saw the second panel when I was a kid, I could've sworn his fist was smoking. "Wait-he PUNCHED the rocket?"

(Reply to this)

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