One panel from the Savage Sword of Conan: Completely and gloriously out of context.

[proteus_lives]

Greetings True Believers! This panel from the Savage Sword of Conan #17 makes me laugh. Forget Dr. Drew or Ann Landers, if you need relationship advice or tips on dealing with wenches, you go to Conan of Cimmeria by Crom!

Suggested Tags:
char: conan the barbarian
title: the savage sword of conan
publisher: marvel comics
creator: roy thomas
creator: john buscema
creator: alfredo alcala






So Conan believes that women aren't real until you've spanked them.

Hmmm, I believe his theory merits further investigation. ;)

Comments

[colonel_green]

This story arc was one of my favourites from Savage Sword. The Devi was one of the more interesting of Conan's incredible parade of damsels.

The particular sequence this is a part of I liked especially, from Conan's buying the clothes from the peasant girl, to the fact that the Devi's disguise is considerably less revealing than the typical sword-and-sorcery string-bikini she had before.

I like to imagine that it was writing such a (comparatively) naughty comic was Roy Thomas' release-valve from all the painfully straight-arrow superheroes he was writing elsewhere.

[proteus_lives]

One of my faves too. The Devi was awesome. I love their farewell scene where Conan says he'll march to her city with 50,000 men and she promises to meet him with a 100,000 men. Conan loves that.

The scene with the peasant girl is cool, she's all "cool I have a gold coin" and waltzes off naked.

SSoC was very naughty, violent and erotic. I imagine Thomas and Buscema had a ton of fun on it.

[karthzon.livejournal.com]

The entire thing is lifted from one of Howard's original Conan stories, you know. Including that line. As far as Conan's women go, I still find Valeria the best (I have no idea if the story involving her, Red Nails, ever got made into a comic), but Yasmina isn't bad either.

[proteus_lives]

Red Nails has been in comic format several times. Both in the old SSOC and the newer Dark Horse series.

[fungo_squiggly]

It looks more like he just threw an invisible baseball at her back.

[proteus_lives]

That's her stumbling forward. When Conan spanks you, you feel it.

[mullon]

Conan takes over the Blue Fairy's job.

[lamashtar]

::spit-take::

[taggerung301]

*tries Conan's advice, ends up in hospital
dammit . . . .

[colonel_green]

Maybe you didn't slap hard enough.

[taggerung301]

hm . .. you may be right . . .
*tries again, gets punched by nurse
dammit . . . .

[proteus_lives]

Try calling her a "comely wench". That usually works for Conan.

[taggerung301]

Ah! That must be it . . .
*tries once more and dies

[punishermax]

Wow, didn't know Johnny Bravo posted here.

[cmdr_zoom]

mmm. daily.
HOO HA!

[proteus_lives]

Admittingly, you need mighty Cimmerian-thews to make this work.

[tacobob]

Conan just enjoys slapping people who wear genie pants! Watch out MC Hammer!

[joasakura]

and "hammer time" takes on a new meaning....

[punishermax]

BY CROM. WE'VE HAD A LOT OF FUN TONIGHT BUT YOU KNOW WHAT ISN'T FUN?

SEXUAL HARASSMENT. IF YOU SEE A MAN TOUCHING A WOMAN IN A WAY SHE DOES NOT APPRECIATE, TELL HIM TO STOP, AND IF THAT FAILS, BATHE YOUR SWORD IN THE COPPER RIVER OF HIS LIFEBLOOD AND PLACE HIS HEAD UPON THE ALTER OF THE WAR GOD.

[thosefew]

I read the above as narrated by Mako. It was better that way.

[wasabi.livejournal.com]

I wonder if Red Sonja ever put up with Conan-spankage. Or at least took turns?

[colonel_green]

When she appeared earlier in SSoC, she enforced a strict hands-off policy.

[dcbanacek.livejournal.com]

And if that didn't work, she'd kill the handless bastard.

[proteus_lives]

Which only encouraged Conan to try harder. Sonja always seemed more tolerant of his behavior then any other man.

[cmdr_zoom]

by CROM!