War Of The Supermen #0 Free Comic Book Day

[superfangirl1]

Tags: Title: War Of The Supermen,Publisher: DC Comics









Zod pull the "how you going to stop me"? When I already call the attack 2 minutes ago and the troops are on earth already.




Lois finds out that jimmy alive and he got's info to bring general lane down. He ask lois is she ready to learn more about her father actions.

Lois respond absolutely! XD

Comments

[From: lanternicity]

Lois's face in that last panel is serious lolz.

[From: hearthemvoices]

I'm Superman.

[From: jjgalahad]

Lois: "NOOOO! NOT MY COFFEE! MY PRECIOUS COFFEE, SPILLING, SLOSHING, MY COFFEEEEEE, NOOOOOOOO, FUCK, NOOOOOOOOOOO!"

[From: punishermax]

"JESUS NOT THE PENCILS!? MY WORLD IS BECOMING A SWIRLING VORTEX OF HORROR!!!!! MY PENCILS AND MY COFFEE AND MY WHITEOUT TOO?! OH JESUS FUCK ALMIGHTY WHAT HAVE I DONE of hey Jimmy"

[From: glprime]

"GODDAMIT, OLSEN, THAT PAGER WAS AN ANTIQUE!!! OR RETRO MODERN!!! BUT IT STILL HAD VALUE WHEN CELL RECEPTION WAS BAD!!! AAAAAAARRRRRGHH!!!!!"

[From: punishermax]

~Louis pulls a gun out of a drawer and pushes it into Jimmy's face~

You read the Bible Jimmy? Cause there's a passage I got memorized.Ezekial 25:17. The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who, in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of the darkness. For he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children.

~she stands up with the gun still pointed at Jimmy~

AND I WILL STRIKE DOWN UPON THEE WITH GREAT ANGER AND VENGEANCE AND FURIOUS ANGER THOSE WHO TRY TO POISON MY BROTHERS OR FUCK UP MY FUCKING PAPER. AND YOU WILL KNOW I AM THE LORD WHEN I LAY THAT ANGER UPON YOU. And if you ever heard it, it meant your ass

~Jimmy is shaking in pure fear as Louis lights up a Lucky Strike~

See, now I'm thinkin': maybe it means you're the evil man. And I'm the righteous man. And Mr. 9mm here, he's the shepherd protecting my righteous ass in the valley of darkness. Or it could mean you're the righteous man and I'm the shepherd and it's the world that's evil and selfish. And I'd like that.

~she exhales a big cloud of smoke and grinds the gun into his forehead~

But that shit ain't the truth. The truth is you're the weak. And I'm the tyranny of evil men. But I'm tryin',Jimmy.. I'm tryin' real hard to be the shepherd.

[From: glprime]

"Louis"?

All kidding aside, picturing the Daily Planet's power duo as enforcers of Marsellus Manheim is a mash-up delight.

Lois: [holding up a Kooey Kooey Kooey Burger] Hey Smallville, you want a bite of this?
Clark: Not hungry.

Lois: Ah! What the fuck! What the fuck happened?
Clark: Ah, man, I heat visioned Marvin and Wendy in the face.
Lois: Why the fuck did you do that!?
Clark: Well I didn't mean too, it was an accident!

Olsen: Did you see a sign when you rolled up that said "Dead New Gods Storage"?
Lois: Jimmy, you know we didn't see no-
Olsen: No- NO! Lois! Did you see a sign?
Lois: ...No Jimmy, we didn't see no sign.
Olsen: That's 'cuz it ain't there! 'Cuz storin' dead New Gods ain't my fuckin' business.

[From: jjgalahad]

Oracle: "All I'm doing is contemplating the if's."
Lois: "I don't want to hear about no motherfuckin' IF's! All I wanna hear from your ass is 'You don't have no problem, Lois! I'm ON the Motherfucker. Go on back in there, chill those heroes out and wait for the cavalry which should be coming DIRECTLY!'"
Oracle: "You ain't got no problems, Lois. I'm ON the motherfucker. Go back in there and chill those heroes out and wait for The Bat, who should be coming directly."
Lois: ". . . you sending The BAT?"
Oracle: "Feel better, motherfucker?
Lois: "Shit, O! That's all you had to say!"

Batman: "It's 30 minutes away. I'll be there in ten."

Batman: "You're . . . Jimmy, right? This is your house?"
Jimmy: "Sure is."
Batman: "I'm the Goddamn Batman. I solve problems."

[From: glprime]

Lois: What does Marsellus Wallace look like?
Chemo: UT?
Lois: What country are you from?
Chemo: UT? UT? U-
Lois: "UT" ain't no country I've ever heard of. They speak English in UT?
Chemo: UT?
Lois: English, motherfucker, do you speak it?!
Chemo: HSS! HSS!
Lois: Then you know what I'm sayin'!
Chemo: HSS!
Lois: Describe what Marsellus Wallace looks like!
Chemo: UT?
Lois: Say 'UT' again. Say 'UT' again, I dare you, I double dare you, motherfucker, say 'UT' one more Goddamn time!

Harley: I love you, Ivy.
Ivy: I love you, Harley Barley. [standing up with a gun] All right, everybody be cool, this is a robbery!
Harley: Any of you fucking pricks move, and I'll execute every motherfucking last one of ya!

Billy "The Wizard" Batson: Goddamn... That's a pretty fucking good chocolate egg cream. I don't know if it's worth five dollars but it's pretty fucking good.

Lois: We should have power rings for this kind of deal.
Clark: How many up there?
Lois: Three or four.
Clark: That's countin' our guy?
Lois: Not sure.
Clark: So that means there could be up to five guys up there?
Lois: It's possible.
Clark: We should have fuckin' power rings.

[From: autumn_lily]

Coffee is sacred.

[From: icon_uk]

I know Jimmy apparently was fished out of the harbour two days ago, but why would the REAL Jimmy still be dripping wet? Or is he doing his best "Creepshow" moment... Or was he just as scared as Lois apparently was?

[From: pyrotwilight]

Well, it is raining in the comic... XD

[From: jlroberson]

Jimmy's too tough for an umbrella. Or he grew up in Seattle and has never heard of them.

[From: cainofdreaming]

And afterwards General Lane will have to live with the fact that he was brought down by Superman's Pal, Jimmy Olsen. If that's not just desserts then I don't know what is.

[From: jaybee3]

I haven't been a big fan of this storyline (I find parts of it tedious especially since its obvious now "New Krypton" will be leaving the DC solar system when its done) but Jimmy Olsen being the one to bring it all crashing down on Lane would be AWESOME.

[From: q99]

Word :) And about darn time!

[From: jlroberson]

Is it just me who's looked at this whole New Krypton thing(I could stop right there, actually, but..) and been struck by a few things:

1) My god, this is formless, slow and boring and in the old days could have been taken care of in a few issues(it's a stealth "event" and after BLACKEST NIGHT I have had my fill of events--and, I think, DC);

2) Yeah, like none of us saw this coming(I was about as shocked as Kyle was that Cartman was working for the Wall-Mart), and was having Ursa lick blood off a kryptonite knife--oh take your pick: inappropriate(I'm really getting sick of this attempt at perverse shit in DC--doesn't really belong), stupid, excuse me that's kryptonite you idiot, etc.;

3) Have we been given any reason whatsoever to admire New K's civilization? It seems to me the overwhelming sense has been that their civilization is a rigid, stratified, chauvinistic(in the old sense), warlike and paranoid group of people and, if they have a culture outside militarism and science, I'm damned if I can name any examples I've been shown. I've seen them as, at best, loose cannons from the very start. Everything I hear about Krypton here makes it seem like it's kind of good for the universe it DID blow up, because they were a serious threat to their neighbors, only a little less like this than the racist Daxamites, their relatives. And then? This supposedly superior and brilliant civilization, as one, without ANY dissent or even blinking, quite gleefully goes along with Zod in attacking Earth, and has shown itself quite easily led by its nose. As easily as the citizens of Springfield or the MU.

What I'm saying is, if they've been trying to remove any sense there would be anything tragic about the loss of Kryptonians(because, let's face it, Earth will have to win) and lead us to sympathize with Lane & Luthor's views, mission accomplished. They've only proven that Kal and Kara were aberrations and that Kryptonians are really nasty pieces of work.

Compare this to something like Gerber & Colan's PHANTOM ZONE. Same basic idea, but much more intelligent and to the point. (why DC doesn't reprint it I do not know)

[From: big_daddy_d]

You actually raised some good points. Although I gotta admit, not much on earth's side either considering we got General Lane being an asshole so considering on one side we got him and the other we got Zod, it ultimately comes down to it being a "Clash of Assholes."

[From: jlroberson]

True--you could liken it to CLOCKWORK ORANGE in that the issue of who's the victim is mitigated by both sides being assholes.

And one more thing about that licking-the-blood thing.

DC. This isn't FAUST. Okay? It wasn't sexy then, and not now. And might I add that the overblown nature of the art and storytelling(such as it is--I'm getting tired of comics full of splash pages, now ones that extend over double-page spreads; it's all I can think of when remembering BLACKEST NIGHT and it's a cheat) throws out the entire dramatic tone that's been set up till now, for what that's worth? Now everyone's all straining muscles and teeth. And licking blood off kryptonite knives. For which I'm sure some fanboy's lonely orgasm, somewhere, is grateful.

And off a kryptonite knife?

DC. One thing you can say: everyone knows what kryptonite does.

She says it causes her pain as she holds it but it's worth it. Well, you know what? This amount of kryptonite has been known to kill Kryptonians. Well, except when Gates have long speeches to give us. They all stand and kneel there not in any visible pain. It comes off as irritation. They've spent some time telling us that this stuff works by driving the yellow sun energy from their cells. So the pain would be the least of it. She couldn't be fast as she is in the scene. Zod would not be standing near it, and he's near enough.

It's like, it's kryptonite when it needs to be. Its whole effect? Something that can cut Superman. Well, any blade of kryptonian metal could too. And they've gone on & on about these red-sun guns. They couldn't use that?

This is stupid.

[From: darkblade]

Thank you. For reminding me the biggest problem I had with this.

You don't lick a poisoned knife dumbass!

[From: jlroberson]

Imagine a human being licking plutonium--and then holding it and standing near it, and having secreted it upon one's person prior to that for some minutes at least--and we see how this is SO FUCKING STUPID.

"Why doth Laertes fall before striking Hamlet?"
"No! But in truth it looked so...so tasty..."

[From: protogarrett]

This whole New Krypton thing...

[From: thehefner]

I actually loved the whole New Krypton storyline at the start, if only solely for the role it gave Zod. I loved seeing Zod as the Magneto to Superman's Xavier.

And now, after they've already dragged-out this storyline, we get the "Yeah, I'm still EEEEEEEEVIL after all!" reveal that no one ever saw coming.

There is not enough "sigh" in the world.

[From: skalja]

Motto. *facepalm*

[From: jlroberson]

It's like, you almost didn't need to read a single issue of New Krypton but the first special...everything you need to know was otherwise already in "Last Son."

Which was good. All that stuff up to & including the first Brainiac story, so good. Why, DC?

[From: thehefner]

That's an absolutely excellent point. This revelation and development renders pretty much the entire point of WORLD OF NEW KRYPTON irrelevant. And after all the excellent stuff that Johns did, which felt like a worthy follow-up to Morrison's ALL-STAR SUPERMAN, this is all just so incredibly frustrating.

[From: falseaesop]

"WE ATTACK EARTH!" -Zod
"Zod are you a fucking moron? Earth's people have fought off roughly 500 alien invasions, mad gods, fucking Darkseid, the Anti-Monitor, Megeddon, is the focal point in the multiverse, and has five Green Lanterns who call it home. Do you really think this is a good idea?" - Should be Superman's response.

[From: glprime]

To which Zod responds, "Do you see this fucking evil goatee? This is a COSMIC-LEVEL evil goatee. Sinestro and his Snidly Whip-stache don't know SHIT about this goddamn goatee. They will rename this look a Zod when I am done with your planet."

Superman: My god, he's gone mad with goatee power.

[From: jlroberson]

"I do not think you're listening, Kal-El. KNEEL BEFORE ZOD'S GOATEE."

"I didn't submit to the Metropolis Club for Bearded Gentlemen, I'll be damned if I do it for YOU!"

[From: falseaesop]

"Zod, even if you have defeated me, manage to defeat the JLA, the JSA, and kill more Titans than Black Adam, there are still the villians. And your goatee will be powerless against The Shade's dapper stylings!"

[From: jlroberson]

At which feedback stabs into Robinson's head. "DAMN YOU SCANS DAILY! YOU KNOW I AM POWERLESS OVER MENTIONS OF THE SHADE!"

[From: ninjapeps]

maybe that's what this series is leading up to. it's only using Superman villains but in the end, it's the Shade that's gonna save the world with Jack Knight along for the ride.

[From: jlroberson]

Perhaps Robinson's current kinda trashy writing is actually a form of terrorism. He'll keep killing and mutilating DC characters until DC gives him STARMAN back. (With Bill Sienkiewicz.)

And if that's his aim, fight on, brother!

[From: intertobamf]

I think this story would've been a lot better if Geoff Johns or Greg Rucka stayed.

[From: jlroberson]

We're getting to that dreaded point where Robinson goes, "Ahh, fuck character and subtlety."

[From: mullon]

Oh thank God, I was worried that Zod wasn't evil.

[From: big_daddy_d]

Anyone else notices how this season of Smallville has been mirroring the New Krypton arc? Not a complaint as I been really enjoying this season but still.

[From: darkblade]

Also Watchtower gives them an excuse to reuse the old Delphi prop from the amusingly bad Birds of Prey series.