Never trust clark to watch your pets.

[superfangirl1]

From Superfamily #197

Comments

[megami18]

Someone better call the ASPCA.

[q99]

Best part is that'd probably work in real life, it's just not a particularly nice way and kinda dumb :)

Oh, Clark...

[angel_negra]

This wouldn't be a problem if you'd stop talking to yourself out loud, you silly goose, Clark.

[proteus_lives]

Oh I love Super-Dick.

[http://www.google.com/profiles/apennell8]

So, he just happened to have a giant Myna suit laying around?

[fredneil.livejournal.com]

Or he could teach it to say "Lois Lane is Superman," "Jimmy Olsen is Superman," "Elvis Presley is Superman," and "Bill Cosby is Superman," then maybe spend the rest of those few hours finding someone whose life he can save. In the bird suit.

[punishermax]

~Diana, Hal, Ollie and Dinah slowly walk to the entrance to the Fortress of Solitude. Hal is in the middle of telling a story to the others~

"So there I was, surrounded by Black Lanterns when-"

"You whipped out your dick and went straight for the nearest alien girl?"

"Exactly, so I pulled it out and then...I really fucking hate you Dinah"

"Okay, enough about how Hal likes to lay pipe in the final frontier. Let's just go and get this stupid bird for Jimmy and leave. I have to catch yup on House if I'm ever going to bitch on the internet about it."

~they reach the fortress and enter. By climbing through the keyhole. Duh~

~They are shocked by the image of a man in a bird costume yelling at a smaller bird in a cage~

"So um...who else is reminded of The Dark Crystal? Anyone?"

"Welp...that explains what Clark does on Friday nights. It also explains a variety of other things. Some that really did not need explaining."

"Hal fucked an underage alien. Just in case anyone forgot. Just throwing that back out into the waters here."

~Clark lifts the costumes head off~

"Look I'm just trying to create a fear response in the bird so it doesn't say that I'm superman to Jimmy!"

~Hal looks around for a moment, a light bulb suddenly appears over his head~

~He blasts the bird with his ring~

"JESUS FUCK! HAL WHAT THE HELL!?"

"We can just get an identical bird and give it to Jimmy! He'll be non the wiser!"

Did you have to fucking kill it Hal? Couldn't we have just kept it here? What the fuck did slaughtering it help with? See, it's shit like this that keeps us from adopting a kitten for the League."

"Also, feel free to consult your big Seventh Heaven episode guide to help us out of any more jams you asshole.Maybe we can defeat Lex Luthor by setting him up on two dates on the same day."

[psychopathicus_rex]

Well, you have to admit, he's inventive. It's not a solution I would have come up with.

[riskypair]

I feel that superman should be able to do this in an easier way. If only he had some kind of power that could condition the bird automatically. What would be really cool is some type mind manipulation! You know, something, dare I say it, like super-hypnotism maybe? It's really too bad he doesn't have anything like that.

http://media.comicvine.com/uploads/3/39827/962481-superman_45_super_telepath_super.jpg

Oh...wait...

[saralakali]

This is not Silver Age. It was originally published in 1979. Even though at the time, we were still calling that Silver Age, now that time period has been reclassified as Bronze Age. Silver Age ended around 1970.