Entry tags:

creator: andrew hussie, medium: webcomic, series: awesome new female characters, title: homestuck

Terezei is a troll. Essentially that means she's an alien who lives in a very fucked up society based on war, death and survival of the fittest. She's also blind and has a very strong interest in law and order, something which she likes to LARP about every day. With her stuffed animals. Yeah, she's a bit weird.

So right now begins the trial of the century....Senator Lemonsnout on trial for stealing from the royal coffers. Let's watch shall we?



"Most of the interrogation is in the intimidating silence."



"You don't want to slap too hard. Enough to sting, but not to bruise. It must be methodical, business-like. And persistent. You only stop when you smell tears."



"Mr. Senator, you smell very nice. Your luscious yellow scales are like the sweetest gumdrops to the prosecution's nose.

But your deceit STINKS.

Did you honestly think you could dip your corpulent snout into the imperial beetle coffers like that and get away with it?? Did you think your revolting abuse of the public trust would go unnoticed??? THINK AGAIN, GOOD SENATOR. WHILE THE PROSECUTION MAY BE BLIND, REST ASSURED THE LEAGUE OF LEGISLACERATORS SEES ALL."



"Oh, well played, Lemonsnout. Well played. The prosecution's key witness, murdered. How convenient! The courtblock has little choice but to acknowledge your cunning. You have earned just a teensy sliver of your respect back. For now.

But wait... "





"As the prosecutor, it is your job to reach a final verdict and sentence the reprehensible felon, while His Tyranny watches in silence and submits grim approval.

But you take pity on this miserable bureaucrat. You are feeling merciful. You will give him a fighting chance.

You will flip a DOUBLE-HEADED TROLL CAEGAR to decide his fate. You do this quite often when making important decisions. Kind of like Batman's nemesis, Two-Face. Or that guy from No Country for Old Men. It turns out there are lots of badasses out there flipping coins. But those are Earth things and you've never heard of them. It's safe to say you borrowed this gimmick from one of the many, many troll things out there that's got hard boiled dudes flipping coins for major stakes. You base the habit on whichever one smells the most badass."




"A favorable flip. The senator exhales in relief."


"But, what are you so happy about, Mr. Lemonsnout?

He looks a bit confused. He quivers his lowly proboscis at the coin.

See? The coin has exonerated him."



"Coin? What coin?

Surely you jest, Mr. Senator. The prosecution sees no coin."



"SHE'S BLIND, REMEMBER?"







Medium: webcomic Title: Homestuck Creator: Andrew Hussie