That is a bizarre little ditty I put together in a fit of peak while obsessing over my favorite comic book character. You can follow me over the fold for a few freaky scans following a full lyric sheet for that strangest of songs.
Doreen Green has got me insane in the membrane...
Break you off a slice of bread,
Gonna go straight to your head.
Bustin your ass, peas and rice.
Oh isn't it so nice
When I get on the mic to spit my stuff
You be like huffin and puff
But my house still standing up.
No tomatoes, dressing on the side.
Gonna throw away my gun,
And then we'll have some fun.
Gonna get into your fridge.
Oh My God your name is midge.
Or midget, whatever.
I'm bigger, any weather.
It's raining down like hell.
I will ring your bell.
You will want to get some more.
When you see what is in store.
On the next track, on the floor, on the ceiling.
Oh well, what a feeling I gave you.
(Those are the actual lyrics. I just turned on the microphone and went all freestyle. Let this be a lesson. Never rap on an empty stomach. Let's move on to the comic book scans, shall we?.)
I opened that comic and what did I see? Squirrel Girl herself, smiling at me.
It seems that Marvel's Dark Reign actually included the Great Lakes Avengers. Good times.
That is some psychotic stuff, reminds me of my good buddy Dave Devries. Wanna get crazier? Let's do it.
Yes, my friends, that is official canon. Squirrel Girl is also known as "The Slayer of All That Breathes". No wonder I can't get her out of my head.
Yes we have been blessed by the original black line pages of her appearance in I Am An Avenger #1, thanks to the artist Tom Fowler himself.
But then, as soon as my frantic mind seems soothed, things get wild all over again.
She did indeed kiss Speedball in continuity. I don't know whether to be jealous or aroused...
Whew. It was all just a dream. Not like the psychotic rap video that started this whole nutty mess.
But close. Very, very close.