http://iambickilometer.insanejournal.com/ ([identity profile] iambickilometer.insanejournal.com) wrote in [community profile] scans_daily2009-05-20 21:27

Marvel Adventures - Super Heroes #1

As requested, the Marvel Adventures issue with the Grecian hellhounds. Pure crack, guys.

This is also, ah, my first post here - so if I've screwed up somehow, let me know.


Our heroes are enjoying some down time… perhaps too much. We find them idly experimenting with Spidey's stickiness.



When suddenly…



Hercules has something of a tie-up that keeps him from the vacation he's been wanting. Good thing our heroes are so accomodating.



So the dogs get loose, and the first fight with Cerberus and Orthus is underway! Spidey and Shellhead are summarily pwned, but Hulk easily manages to subdue Orthus with a mighty blow. Unfortunately…



…there are two dogs.

A chase ensues, and our heroes manage to track Cerberus to a nearby park, where he's chewing on a statue. Fight #2 ensues. Points go something like this: Dogs – 1, Hulk – 2, Spidey & Iron Man – -3.



Obedience school is glossed over. Iron Man gets chewed up a lot. Spidey films it all. But after a long, frustrating while, the dogs' behaviour begins showing a marked improvement. They roll over! They beg! They don't try to eat Tony Stark!

In one panel, we get a shot of a rather attractive, leggy woman, who turns out to be running a dog show. Impressed by the domestication of Cerberus and Orthus, she asks our heroes to bring them to the show. Our heroes are understandably dubious. Attractive Dog Show Lady manages to convince them otherwise, with her feminine wiles and the clever notion to appeal to our heroes' philanthropic leanings.



Our heroes wander the show for a while and insult other people's dogs. Hercules turns up and tries to pick up some ladies, who spurn him because they don't believe he's really Hercules. To prove his identity, Hercules attempts to fight Cerberus – but Hulk, having grown fond of the "doggies", attacks him. Another brawl ensues, but the combined efforts of Spidey, Iron Man, Hulk, and both dogs easily take him down. End score: Dogs: 5, Hulk: 8, Spidey – 3, Iron Man – -4, Hercules – even zero, because he scored a ribbon, even if he didn't score with the ladies.



Orthus runs off with a chihuahua. Hulk gets a ribbon and some pizza. The end.