Amazing Spider-Man #604: The page in question ...

[box_in_the_box.insanejournal.com]

... Establishing the new status quo for Peter and his "new girl," as discussed in this post.

HA HA HA SHE JUST NEEDED A GOOD STIFF ONE TO SET HER STRAIGHT AMIRITE???

NEVER MIND THAT IT WAS A SUPERVILLAIN WHO RAPED HER USING PETER'S FACE, BECAUSE COMEDY!!!

... Shit like this makes me think that whoever wrote it believes that vaginas have teeth.

Comments

[psychop_rex.insanejournal.com]

Look, first off, this is the first time it has become RELEVANT to me that my dictionary was published in the '70's, OK? Normally, I just look up unloaded words like 'obsequious' or something; this is the first time I've ever looked up a word that has such social weight. It's never failed me before.
Second, yes, I could have looked it up on Wikipedia or something, but it was the middle of the damn night, and I THOUGHT I was just dashing off a quick message before bed, and I was curious to see what the dictionary said. That's all. An error? Yes, certainly, but not one based on laziness.
Third, think what you like of me, man. I'm tired of damn well apologizing. How many times have I done it now? Three? Four? Five? I have ADMITTED that I made a colossal blunder in no uncertain terms, I have apologized over and over again, and still you keep screaming at me. I GET that this is a loaded issue, and that I touched a nerve, and that my reference material led me down the wrong path and I shouldn't have relied on it. I GET all that, but what you don't seem to get was that it was INADVERTENT, as I have said time and time again. It was unintentional, and I'm sick of being bellowed at for what basically boils down to a large faux pas. I have tried to be civil about this since the beginning of the discussion, I've admitted my mistakes, and all I get is extra lashings of venom. Well, up yours, too! If you can't accept a basic apology, then you have no business carrying on a discussion of any sort. I don't damn well care what you think of me at this point - I'm sick and tired of arguing with you, because you obviously think that translates to you screaming at me and me just sitting and taking it, because obviously, YOU'RE right and I'M wrong. Get off your high horse, man! People are human, we make mistakes! I have HAD it with apologizing and re-apologizing simply because you're too busy tearing me a new one to listen! You think I'm a monster? Well, my opinion of you is not too damn high either at the moment, and the only reason I'm not expressing it in direct terms is because I don't want to be banned from the board. I am NOT a monster, I am a human being who made an honest mistake and has admitted as such, and if you can't accept that, then up yours and the horse you rode in on! This isn't about rape anymore, this is about you and your attitude. You can bellow the house down as far as I'm concerned - you can pound the keyboard and spit obscenities and castigate me as the lowest form of life on Earth - I don't care anymore. I have absolutely no interest in the opinions of a man too caught up in his own fury to carry on a civil conversation. Good day, sir, and goodbye.

[box_in_the_box.insanejournal.com]

In some ways, the fact that this was unintentional on your part actually makes it WORSE, because it indicates an underlying mindset of entitlement and privilege that is what led you to make that mistake in the first place - the same mentality that led you to believe that "rape" is as much an "unloaded word" as "obsequious" - and the fact that you refuse to unpack your own privilege knapsack enough to examine the wrong-headed underlying mentality that caused you to make those mistakes pretty much justifies every negative thing I've said here.

I don't CARE about your apologies, because unless you're also CHANGING THE WAY THAT YOU THINK, they don't actually MEAN anything - otherwise, they're basically NON-apologies, along the lines of, "I'm sorry that YOU got offended."

[psychop_rex.insanejournal.com]

If you don't care about my apologies, then what was the point of starting this chinwag in the first place? The only way to conclude an argument is for one person to admit that they were wrong, a thing that I have done. The discussion is OVER, sir, until you get down off your damn soapbox. You may not care about my apologies, but I don't care about your criticisms. There is no further we can go. Good day.

[box_in_the_box.insanejournal.com]

If you don't care about my apologies, then what was the point of starting this chinwag in the first place?

To force you to CHANGE YOUR UNDERLYING MINDSET on this issue, as I have already stated several times before.

The only way to conclude an argument is for one person to admit that they were wrong, a thing that I have done.

No, not really, because you're STILL trying to say that it was somehow reasonable to use a 40-year-old dictionary as a definitive reference for morally and ethically charged issues, like rape, and unless you change your UNDERLYING MINDSET on this, then I can easily anticipate, in the near future, you making similar mistakes with regards to racial issues ("But 'negro' is still an acceptable term, according to my dictionary!") or gender identity issues ("But 'cisgendered' doesn't appear anywhere in my dictionary!"). You honestly thought that an issue as contentious and as affected by current events as rape could be adequately summed up by a single dictionary entry from four decades ago, and you entered into a debate with people who were saying otherwise without doing ANY further homework on the subject (even the FIVE SECONDS it would have taken on Google, which shows your entitlement), and if your worldview is THAT simplistic, then you really do need to THROW YOUR DICTIONARY OUT, because it's CRIPPLING you mentally.

[psychop_rex.insanejournal.com]

Man, have you even been READING my messages so far? I am NOT saying that it was reasonable to use a forty-year old dictionary; I have admitted I don't know how many times that it was a dumb mistake that I shouldn't have made. And how, may I ask, to you plan to force me to change my 'underlying mindset'? By yelling at me? That's a wonderful tactic, that is. For that matter, how do you even know what my underlying mindset IS? You don't know me, you've never met me, you've never talked to me in person, you don't know what my background is - for all you or I know, either of us could be sophisticated computer programs designed to talk on message boards. And yet you automatically assume, based on a few ill-chosen phrases and mistaken assumptions on my part, that my mindset MUST be what you think it is, because goodness knows it couldn't be that this IS a complex issue, and that a perfectly well-intentioned person might offend someone completely by accident by bringing it up in conversation. No, no, I must be a clueless, xenophobic bookworm who depends entirely on an out-of-date dictionary. Well, you may be a perfect gentleman in person, for all I know, but to me, you're coming across as a self-righteous tyrant who automatically thinks the worst of his fellow man, and refuses to give him the benefit of the doubt. It may be a sweeping, unfair assumption on my part, but it's no worse than what you're doing.

[box_in_the_box.insanejournal.com]

I do tend to think the worst of my fellow man, because reality itself usually proves me right.

[psychop_rex.insanejournal.com]

'Usually' is not 'always'. I'm no 'little merry sunshine' myself, but I make it a policy to give people the benefit of the doubt in most situations, and have often been rewarded for it. I'm sorry if your experience has led you to different conclusions, but each to their own.