http://colonel_green.insanejournal.com/ ([identity profile] colonel_green.insanejournal.com) wrote in [community profile] scans_daily2009-11-04 03:45 pm

Merc with a Myth



Four scans apiece from Assault on New Olympus Prologue and Deadpool Team-Up #899, featuring the Incredible Hercules.

In descending order of seriousness, we start off with the Deadpool issue, in which Deadpool and Herc get trapped inside a labyrinth by the villain team-up of Arcade (who wants to kill Deadpool for horning in on his assassin business) and Nightmare (who wants revenge on Hercules for the whole "God Squad" episode). They get attacked by a bunch of robots, but thanks to Nightmare's meddling the robots look like, respectively, the embodiment of Deadpools' two other head-voices and a bunch of Hercules' dead children.

Eventually, Deadpool figures out how to solve the problem: he lobotomizes himself by separating his left and right lobes, cutting off the other two voices (so he's now sane):



Herc turned down someone? (even someone who lured him into a deathtrap?)





I bet Cho is sorry he missed that.

In more serious terrain, over in iHerc it's time to face off with Hera (whose plan is, perhaps unsurprisingly, to kill all humans in the Fourth Extinction of Man). Though we still don't know how. Athena and Amadeus strike out with all the other outcast gods, who are fence-sitting until they see who comes out on top. However, Hebe's a big hit at the homeless shelter, and gets interviewed on the news, which sends Herc off to retrieve her. He stumbles across her while she's sucking face with Peter (who, amusingly parallels my earlier criticism about how his aunt now apparently thinks it's okay to set him up with homeless people), which leads to Peter getting punched through a wall or two, and a fight with Spider-Man. Despite his free-lovin' lifestyle, Herc's views on marriage are (understandably) pretty Ancient Greek.

Eventually, Herc buries Spidey under a bunch of cars, but Hebe intervenes and tearfully asks that he explain why she was such a bad wife that he ran away (and constantly steps out with other women). Herc says it was never about her.





Speaking to the whole issue, the writers do an amazing job with Hebe here. Imagine being the daughter of the Goddess of Marriage, having your marriage fail, and have mom tell you it's all your own fault (though that's an interesting belief when applied to Hera's own mindset, really).

Anyway, everybody's friends now, and back to dealing with the Hera question.



Final page: Spidey is here to help, along with Jessica and Logan.

See Amadeus, that's why you don't get invited to Tijuana.

What could Aunt May possibly think is going on there?

[identity profile] foxhack.insanejournal.com 2009-11-04 08:55 pm (UTC)(link)
That can't be Tijuana.

I mean, there's no drug lords or men in shades with guns. Not to mention Hercules would've been kidnapped on the spot for ransom the instant he set foot in town.

Yes, I don't like that hellhole very much, can you tell?

[identity profile] damar148.insanejournal.com 2009-11-04 09:02 pm (UTC)(link)
But he's got Deadpool with him. A drunk Deadpool. I'n sure those drug lords remember a sober Deadpool.

[identity profile] thosefew.insanejournal.com 2009-11-05 02:12 am (UTC)(link)
Can Deadpool get drunk with his healing factor?

[identity profile] lieut_kettch.insanejournal.com 2009-11-05 12:36 pm (UTC)(link)
If he's anything like Logan, he can. He just needs lots of booze, and a steady stream of it, since he has to replace the alcohol in his blood faster than his healing factor can process it.

[identity profile] sherkahn.insanejournal.com 2009-11-04 09:12 pm (UTC)(link)
I was just there. I did see Wade and Herc in the wee hours, looking for the burro show.
The guy standing up with both hands outstretched, clapping at the new piƱata? That's me.

I don't remember much else. Herc knows how to through a party.

[identity profile] vignettelante.insanejournal.com 2009-11-04 09:18 pm (UTC)(link)
Hercules. Kidnapped.

Even if Darwin hadn't gotten to them yet, it was probably on the same level of noteworthiness as them buying those bottles they're holding.
digitalraven: (Default)

[personal profile] digitalraven (from insanejournal.com) 2009-11-04 11:50 pm (UTC)(link)
"For you, the day you attempted to kidnap Hercules was the most important—and painful—day of your life. But for me... it was Tuesday."

[identity profile] vignettelante.insanejournal.com 2009-11-05 12:45 am (UTC)(link)
Of course!!

[identity profile] zegim.insanejournal.com 2009-11-05 04:36 am (UTC)(link)
YESSSSS!

[identity profile] proteus_lives.insanejournal.com 2009-11-05 12:36 am (UTC)(link)
Kidnap Hercules?? Bad idea.

And I'd imagine everyone in the criminal underworld is aware of Deadpool and gives him a wide berth unless employing him.

[identity profile] dorksidefiker.insanejournal.com 2009-11-05 01:39 am (UTC)(link)
Even THEN, I'd say the wisest of his employers keep him at a very careful distance.

[identity profile] proteus_lives.insanejournal.com 2009-11-05 10:11 am (UTC)(link)
Yeah. I imagine employers treat mercs like Deadpool, Bullseye, Sabretooth, etc. as weapons of last resort or WMDs. Not because of their power-levels or skill-sets but because of their unpredictablity,

[identity profile] manofbats.insanejournal.com 2009-11-04 08:58 pm (UTC)(link)
The third on-going should have been a buddy comic with Herc and D.P.

[identity profile] mullon.insanejournal.com 2009-11-04 09:02 pm (UTC)(link)
It was nice of Arcade to stick up for us.

[identity profile] freeman333.insanejournal.com 2009-11-09 06:33 am (UTC)(link)
I loled.

You win. Well played.

[identity profile] cainofdreaming.insanejournal.com 2009-11-04 09:04 pm (UTC)(link)
Who's Miss Locke's replacement? And does she know about Arcade's 'retirement package?'

Also, go Hebe!

[identity profile] icon_uk.insanejournal.com 2009-11-04 09:21 pm (UTC)(link)
In my head it's the REAL Miss Locke back from her long vacation, and none of that Arcade killing her nonsense stuck, it was an LMD or something.

[identity profile] icon_uk.insanejournal.com 2009-11-04 09:20 pm (UTC)(link)
Weird, considering someone posted Bloom County earlier today, that there's a very Berke Breatbed character-vibe to Deadpool in his sane voice there.

Oh, and may I be the first to say "HELL YEAH!! Miss Locke is back!!"
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[identity profile] stig.insanejournal.com 2009-11-04 10:30 pm (UTC)(link)
Despite his free-lovin' lifestyle, Herc's views on marriage are (understandably) pretty Ancient Greek.

...He like young virgin men of 16-22 on the side?

[identity profile] kenn_el.insanejournal.com 2009-11-04 10:41 pm (UTC)(link)
That's not what Cho's for?

[identity profile] dorksidefiker.insanejournal.com 2009-11-04 10:46 pm (UTC)(link)
Beat me to it.

(Anonymous) 2009-11-04 10:43 pm (UTC)(link)
That explains Cho, and they're only virgins the first time :P

[identity profile] kenn_el.insanejournal.com 2009-11-04 10:44 pm (UTC)(link)
One would assume that Hera wouldn't get far with Hebe on the subject of marital fidelity, what with Zeus replacing Hebe as the gods' cocktail server with his own lover, Ganymede. Sadly, I doubt Marvel will go there.

[identity profile] mugiwara.insanejournal.com 2009-11-04 10:48 pm (UTC)(link)
Nightmare again? I wonder if that happens before or after the current ATI story...

(Anonymous) 2009-11-05 12:51 am (UTC)(link)
He's also in Doctor Voodoo this month.

It's so weird, in ATI their making Nightmare coming to Earth a huge deal, but he keeps on doing it lately.

(Anonymous) 2009-11-04 11:38 pm (UTC)(link)
If anyone can, could someone please post either deadpool fighting his own quotation boxes (which sounds hilarious) or Herc walking in on Hebe and Peter and the broo ha ha that followed? I'd be forever thankful for one or both!

[identity profile] janegray.insanejournal.com 2009-11-05 12:27 am (UTC)(link)
That explains why he ran away, not why he cheats on her.

[identity profile] proteus_lives.insanejournal.com 2009-11-05 12:34 am (UTC)(link)
Hercules probably invented the "Hate the game, not the player baby." speech.

[identity profile] jupiterrhode.insanejournal.com 2009-11-05 03:59 am (UTC)(link)
So, what, Herc can cheat but Hebe can't? That is so completely disgusting, especially considering the massive amounts of sex Herc's been having in this title alone.

[identity profile] magus_69.insanejournal.com 2009-11-05 08:11 am (UTC)(link)
I can only see three ways for this to end: the reconciliation sticks, they divorce, or Hebe meets a fridge.

I want to be wrong about this, I really truly do, but I fear we'll get the last one.
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[identity profile] stolisomancer.insanejournal.com 2009-11-05 10:43 am (UTC)(link)
You forgot the most obvious and sensible solution: endless threesomes.

[identity profile] magus_69.insanejournal.com 2009-11-05 11:30 am (UTC)(link)
I didn't forget. I ruled it out beforehand precisely because it is obvious and sensible.

(Anonymous) 2009-11-05 03:03 pm (UTC)(link)
Yay! All for that one.

And I bet Herc is too

[identity profile] neuhallidae.insanejournal.com 2009-11-05 04:55 pm (UTC)(link)
I will cry if Hebe goes. I've actually started to like her.

Actually

(Anonymous) 2009-11-05 08:43 pm (UTC)(link)
with the recent Cho-Athena twist I'm thinking we might have a Death of Hercules, rise of Cho thing for a little bit (Cho would obviously go to Hades for Herc- though I do wonder how a hypothetical death of Herc would turn Cho on Athena, I mean he's always been a quick to anger, totally over the top response thing and if he thinks Athena set the whole thing up :) )

(Anonymous) 2009-11-05 03:10 pm (UTC)(link)
Pretty hard to fridge a goddess...especially one who survived an I forget how far fall out of a skyscraper when Hera attacked her.

I don't think Hera would off her own daughter, blood(line) was a pretty big thing to the Greeks. Now maybe if Mikaboshi comes back she could get fridged...

[identity profile] bluefall.insanejournal.com 2009-11-05 08:20 pm (UTC)(link)
Regardless of whether the text shows him to be wrong, it seems OOC for him to hold the opinion at all. For one, that's merely one facet of a whole host of really gross gender biases that comprised ancient Greek views on women, none of the rest of which we ever see from him (and rightly so, the man's supposed to be a likable hero). It's just bizarre to try to reconcile him respecting the agency and personhood of every other woman he's ever met with him thinking he owns his wife. For another, he's just never been a particularly proud or possessive or jealous guy. He was sad when Namora rejected him, not angry or insulting of her virtue, and he considered it her decision rather than fighting Namor for her. In fact it was he who told off Namor to the effect that Namora has the right to sleep with who she pleases.
skalja: Ultimate Spider-Woman posing like a BAMF (spider-man: spideyrat)

[personal profile] skalja 2009-11-16 08:46 pm (UTC)(link)
I dunno. Keeping in mind that I'm a few months behind and haven't read these issues, so am speaking generally: how many of us know that person in real life who's a liberal member of the majority and holds all the enlightened views and even practices them for the most part, but then knee-jerkily reverts to type when confronted with the potential impact of those views on the most intimate parts of their personal life or their past? Heck, how many of us have been that person? Or both? It seems pretty realistic to me that Hercules could be relatively modern-thinking with Namora, who he's only known in the 21st century, but then have a traditionalist freakout with Hebe, whom he got married to thousands of years ago.

Amusingly, back in the 90s Herc had a team-up with Spidey and tried to convince him to party hard with Crete and Spidey wouldn't because he was married and a teetotaller. Careful what you wish for!

[identity profile] okkult3000.insanejournal.com 2009-11-05 06:01 am (UTC)(link)
Welcome to ancient Greece. Women had to stay at home and couldn't leave without an escort; men went to "symposiums" featuring numerous hetaerae.

[identity profile] bj_l.insanejournal.com 2009-11-05 05:04 am (UTC)(link)
Isn't this the second time Deadpool has taken someone to Tijuana? I'm sure he took Monty.

[identity profile] dustbunny105.insanejournal.com 2009-11-05 07:05 am (UTC)(link)
No, he took Monty to Monte Carlo.

[identity profile] bj_l.insanejournal.com 2009-11-05 07:31 am (UTC)(link)
Ah. Did they still do one of those drunk "photos" like he's doing with Hercules?

It's beena long while since I've read Deadpool.

[identity profile] dustbunny105.insanejournal.com 2009-11-05 09:33 am (UTC)(link)
I don't think so, no. Deadpool nabs Monty as his weird way of thanking him for a psychic reading and to exploit Monty's abilities for gambling rather than to go out drinking. Monty does get sort of wasted at one point, but I believe Deadpool is sober when that happens.