Don't mind me...

[neuhallidae]

...I'll just be over here barfing at the handling of Ororo and Emma this entire group shot on the promo image/cover for May's Astonishing X-Men: Xenogenesis miniseries. Image behind the cut.





So, apparently, Storm felt the need to prove that she's one of the heroines who wears a bra, and her new workout regimen has given her hips that could cut tomatoes, while all of Emma's organs migrated into her ass, causing it to hang out from under her new costume.



Tags: char: armor/hisako ichiki, char: beast/hank mccoy, char: cyclops/scott summers, char: storm/ororo, char: white queen/emma frost, char: wolverine/logan/james howlett, creator: kaare andrews (I think, they've got this one credited for the series, but I don't know about covers), in-joke: anatomy does not work that way, in-joke: nothing works that way, team: x-men, title: astonishing x-men.

Comments

[nezchan]

LERN 2 ANATOMY, N00B!

[fungo_squiggly]

Oh god, why!?

[neuhallidae]

Unless the strings are just hiding, both ladies are seemingly going commando as well! That'll be an interesting surprise for the students.

[seriousfic]

Oh God, Logan's arms are MADE of tumors!

[nezchan]

Well damn, how's he gonna help Scott put both his dislocated shoulders back in place, then?

[colonel_green]

If this is Kaare Andrews, he's really gone downhill.

[neuhallidae]

I'm not sure it is him, but he was the only one that I saw credited for art in the accompanying article, so if someone else is doing the covers, I don't know who.

[crinos]

Whose the girl riding around in the red Yellow Devil clone?

[nezchan]

Armor, although it looks like she can only manifest cherry Jell-O now.

[bluefall]

Um.

Whut?

[cleome45]

MY BEAUTIFUL EYYYYYYYYYES!!!

[nezchan]

So since when it Emma only 4' tall? She barely comes up to Scott's chest in platforms here.

And man, that's one lumpy ass.

[pyrotwilight]

I. What. OH GOD. MY EYEEEEEEEEEEEEEZ.

[birdofprey]

...

Yikes.

[dorksidefiker]

Do. Not. Want.

[taggerung301]

<see icon for reaction

[nezchan]

< Agreed.

[la_fono]

Sooooo, both Ororo and Emma have floor-length hair. And no internal organs. >.o

[northstarfan]

So have artists just given up on whether or not Beast is supposed to be all Vincent now?

Also, I'm wondering if that bra was added as an afterthought.

[nezchan]

Not sure why she needs a bra anyhow, when she can just get an invisible shelf like Emma's got. Seriously, her boob is drawn like it's sitting on a solid object, WTF?

[sarno001]

Clearly someone has never seen the female body. Or the male...?

[darkblade]

So I scrolled down to avoid prolonged exposure to the horror and noticed that Scott is just kind of floating there. He doesn't have any feet.

[neuhallidae]

....Holy crap, he doesn't. I didn't even see that.

[zordboy]

Um, what?

[aaron_bourque]

I'll just be over here barfing at the handling of
everyone in this shot

And I'll be joining you.

Aaron "The Mad Whitaker" Bourque; Jesus Christ, Emma's in high heels and she's STILL SHORTER THAN LOGAN WTF???

[neuhallidae]

Point. ::edits::

[yaseen101]

.........................

kkkkekekekkekeahahahahahahahahahahhhahhahhahahahhhhhhhhhhhhaaahahahahahhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhahahhahahahahahhhhahhhahahahahahhhhhaaaaaaaaahhahhahhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhhhaheheheheheheehehheheehhehahahahhahahahhahahahhhahahhhahhaaaaaaaaaaaaaahahahhhhaha......

(continues for another 2 hours)

[cleome45]

You're always so reticent. Nobody can ever tell what you're thinking.

[kintotech]

...That's Emma? She doesn't even look like the same character, to say nothing of the epic anatomy failing everywhere o_O

[ravenous_raven]

< Yeah, this.










Though I do have to say, passing over the highly impractical length for the girls, I rather like the texture of Emma and Storm's hair and Beast's fur.

But that's it.

[robogeek]

They could have let Storm finish putting on her shirt....

Y'know, if you squint a bit, it looks like Scott is sitting on Hank's shoulders.

[nezchan]

GIDDYAP!

[neo_prodigy]

WHO IN THE HELL LET ROB LIEFELD ON X-MEN?!!!!!!!!!!

[northstarfan]

I'm looking at this and wondering if Liefeld wouldn't be an improvement.

...I need to go lie down.

OH GOD

[angel_negra]

WHHYYYYYYYYYY??? *cries*

Also, how the hell did BEAST get to be the only one drawn properly. (Ok, except for the teeny head.)

Re: OH GOD

[khamelea]

Beast is supposed to look monstrous.

[kamino_neko]

Aside from the anatomical strangeness, the costume designs are atrocious. For Storm and Emma, anyway...Scott's is just bland...Armor's OK. Wolvie's fine, and we don't see enough of Beast's to say...but Storm and Emma need work.

The real problem with Storm is that the basics of the design could work, but...somehow it doesn't.

I dunno about Armour

[angel_negra]

Maybe if Armour gave Peter Parker (from Spiderman 3) his emo!bang back, and got some actual musculature going, it could work well for her.

What's killing Storm's for me is the starving African child/anorexic look she's got going. The costume almost works, but the waistline is what distracts you and kills the look.

[crabby_lioness]

I haven't had to say this since the days of Jim Lee and Liefeld, but that art is too ugly for me to buy the book.

[bj_l]

What's wrong with Jim Lee?