Yeah, we know that Batman has to be back in shape in time for the events of the game, so even they're gonna do a "Batman overcomes adversity and whips himself back into shape" kind of story it's still dramatically moot. It's just dark for the sake of being dark.
Wait so these comics are a prequel to the game? Oh, I had no idea. I thought it was a retelling of the games story or a sequel or something. That just makes this series even more hilarious.
'My back is snapped like a pack of UNCOOKED SPAGHETTI! Oh, you just walk up behind me and break my back without saying a word! OH BOO! OH BOO ON YOU, SIR!'
I read this and thought, "I bet I could thread a stick of dry spaghetti through a sausage and break just the spaghetti with only minimal or no rippage to the sausage."
Luckily Batman anticipated this and had his lower vertebrae replaced with the same material as in super-bouncy balls. He has a pencil tucked into his belt so that there's a snapping sound whenever anyone tries this move, but in actuality his spine just goes "Boing!" back into shape.
Once again a comic where Superman pretty much kicked Batman's ass...yet willing to bet people will still complain about Batman always beating Superman.
In other news..... really? We're doing the backbreaker thing again?
Hey, it has meaning to it, Batman's greatest moment of weakness in a situation he couldn't get away.... just like how all the Villain Stories this month have the villains "darker" story elements to them that don't really need to exist...
Scarecrow - Killed by the Joker after he aquired his nerve toxin. Jimmy Olsen - The first kill of the series, killed by the Joker, shot through the camera in the face. Lois Lane - Killed by Superman in a very technical sense, after being driven insane by the Kryptonite-laced fear gas. The city of Metropolis - Nuked by the Joker. The Joker - Killed by Superman. Nightwing - Killed by a rock, aided and abetted by Damian Wayne. Aussie hero who's name escapes me - crippled by Superman for telling him 'no'. Martian Manhunter - Incinerated by Superman. Captain Atom - Killed by Wonder Woman. Wonder Woman - Nuked by Cpt. Atom, expected to recover fully. Jonathan Kent - Arrow to the shoulder, actually a moderate wound at worst. He's fine. Green Arrow - Beaten into a spongy mass by Superman. Batman - See above.
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Date: 2013-09-10 06:38 pm (UTC)no subject
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Date: 2013-09-10 08:54 pm (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 2013-09-10 10:51 pm (UTC)no subject
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Date: 2013-09-10 08:18 pm (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 2013-09-10 06:51 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2013-09-10 07:22 pm (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 2013-09-11 02:47 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2013-09-10 06:58 pm (UTC)SERIOUSLY.
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Date: 2013-09-10 07:35 pm (UTC)I'm sorry guys, but this is my new favorite comic ever.
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Date: 2013-09-10 07:01 pm (UTC)'My back is snapped like a pack of UNCOOKED SPAGHETTI! Oh, you just walk up behind me and break my back without saying a word! OH BOO! OH BOO ON YOU, SIR!'
no subject
Date: 2013-09-10 07:27 pm (UTC)(no subject)
From:no subject
Date: 2013-09-10 08:03 pm (UTC)Y'all ring my DC alarm when Scott and Barda return as a happily married couple. There's no point in me looking until then.
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Date: 2013-09-10 11:29 pm (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 2013-09-10 08:22 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2013-09-10 11:46 pm (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 2013-09-10 09:05 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2013-09-10 09:44 pm (UTC)And now I actually want to test the theory.
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From:no subject
Date: 2013-09-10 10:30 pm (UTC)EDIT: Actually, why doesn't Superman just kill him?
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Date: 2013-09-10 11:08 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2013-09-10 11:10 pm (UTC)In other news..... really? We're doing the backbreaker thing again?
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Date: 2013-09-10 11:45 pm (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 2013-09-10 11:26 pm (UTC)The backbreaker is done on the LUMBAR region, not the waist. Congratulations, you just made the next Botchamania!
no subject
Date: 2013-09-11 12:15 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2013-09-11 07:15 am (UTC)Goddammit I had JUST converted one of my friends to western-style comics.
And you start pulling this shit on me. Why. WHHHYYYY.
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Date: 2013-09-11 08:45 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2013-09-11 09:25 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2013-09-11 02:54 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2013-09-11 02:58 pm (UTC)Scarecrow - Killed by the Joker after he aquired his nerve toxin.
Jimmy Olsen - The first kill of the series, killed by the Joker, shot through the camera in the face.
Lois Lane - Killed by Superman in a very technical sense, after being driven insane by the Kryptonite-laced fear gas.
The city of Metropolis - Nuked by the Joker.
The Joker - Killed by Superman.
Nightwing - Killed by a rock, aided and abetted by Damian Wayne.
Aussie hero who's name escapes me - crippled by Superman for telling him 'no'.
Martian Manhunter - Incinerated by Superman.
Captain Atom - Killed by Wonder Woman.
Wonder Woman - Nuked by Cpt. Atom, expected to recover fully.
Jonathan Kent - Arrow to the shoulder, actually a moderate wound at worst. He's fine.
Green Arrow - Beaten into a spongy mass by Superman.
Batman - See above.
Think that covers everyone so far?
no subject
Date: 2013-09-11 05:24 pm (UTC)...sigh.
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Date: 2013-09-11 03:53 pm (UTC)