Daredevil #34: Matt finally gets serious with Kirsten... sorta

[dragonbat2006]

This is now the read I look forward to most each month.

Comments

[randyripoff]

You realize, of course, that she'll be pushing up daisies like most of Matt's girlfriends soon. Outside of Natasha and Elektra (who died but got better), his track record isn't very good.

[psylynce]

How nice for Matt that he has paralyzing, overwhelming depressions that he can just "get over". Harumph.

[starwolf_oakley]

Things like depression and alcoholism are weird in superhero comics. They have to have psychological reasons instead of brain chemistry reasons. Tony Stark is an alcoholic because of various self-loathing reasons, rather than alcohol is addictive.

It is similar in TV. For years they tried to give some deep psychological reason for House's Vicodin addiction other than the simple "Vicodin addiction."

[starwolf_oakley]

Sorry, that "Vicodin is addictive."

[crabby_lioness]

I've been a chronic depressive for 40 years. By now I can spot a big one coming and act to prevent/alleviate it. In fact I have to wonder about the grown-ups who can't. Kids and young adults are one thing, but after a while you should know your way around the block.

[psylynce]

I am envious of your position. I have good days and I have bad days and for me they are still unpredictable. You must be a very mindful and perceptive person to know yourself so well. I am just not there yet. Please don't wonder about me too much. :)

[crabby_lioness]

Thanks. I'm 47. It's grown over time. :)

Often people give themselves clues. Rachel Maddow say she loses her sense of taste when a depressive bout is about to begin. For me it's either triggered by PTSD or triggered by mounting frustration over something. I've had to learn to watch for the triggers or get blindsided. I hate being blindsided.

[razsolo]

Different strokes for different folks, and obviously causes and symptoms of depression are different for everyone but I actually really liked that panel a lot. I will explain more but it's boring personal stuff so feel free to skip (oh also, this might be triggery for self-injuring):

I have struggled with depression to one degree or another for pretty much all my life and sometimes I go for a couple of years where everything is cool but then there are other times where it's horrible. This year in particular I have gone back a lot of steps, started cutting myself again for the first time in ages, being unable to shake constant misery, drinking myself into blackout states, not very fun....all of this culminated in a trip to the psych ward a couple months ago which is somewhere I really really never want to be again (at the same time I am super grateful to the staff there who were really wonderful). Anyway, the point of all this is that I've been seeing this really good counsellor for about half the year and it has taken a while but he's helped me see that a large part of my issues come from perception and he's been training me to change that. So when Matt says he can feel this paralysing depression because of the horrible things happening around him and then he gets over it, I see that not as the writer being glib but rather Matt saying he's choosing not to let it take control of his life; and then he starts focusing on a positive plan to make the best of his situation. Without trying to sound corny I find it kind of inspirational because that's how I have been trying to consciously approach my life the past couple of months and it has helped. :)

Sorry for the info dump! I didn't wanna just say 'I liked it' and sound like I wasn't putting any thought into it or just being a Waid fanboy about it.

[crabby_lioness]

Yeesh, I'm sorry to hear that. I could tell a bad depression was coming this spring, spent the summer running through my usual coping mechanisms, and finally went to see a therapist this fall when it was clear this one wasn't going anywhere. That's why I haven't been around here much lately; I haven't had much time to read comics these days.

One thing I think people get wrong is mistaking a symptom for a cause. Depression is a symptom of an underlying problem, not the problem itself. It's the psychological equivalent of a fever. Most people who have had a few fevers can tell when one's coming and take steps to alleviate it. Most people who have had a few depressive spells are the same way.

[psylynce]

I appreciated your "info dump". I am surprised, but heartened to hear from other people on this board that struggle with depression like I do.

I prefer your interpretation of the panel. When I read it it triggered my current frustration with my condition. If my depression is largely due to my biased and incorrect perceptions ( with a dose of chemical imbalance ) then I should be able to fix them, right now. I logically know what I need to do, but I just keep repeating the same patterns over and over again. Like Matt I want to just get over it, but I can't. I am stuck. What is wrong with me that I can't fix my own self inflicted problems?

[crabby_lioness]

God, I remember the old "chemical imbalance" excuse. I thought that for decades, but In my case it turned out to be society's way of saying, "We don't know shit."

IF the problem is getting stuck in a destructive behavior loop (which isn't always entirely the case) CBT can work wonders with that. But you have to completely step away from the problem and look at it from another perspective.

But CBT can't work on everything. If your subconscious is convinced you have a perfectly valid reason for your shooting yourself in the foot, it might be worth listening to find out what that reason is.

For years I suffered from bizarre, unpredictable reactions that no one could get a handle on. Sometimes I'd be fine, and sometimes I'd do things that would have had me marked as someone possessed by demons in an earlier age. Regular depression treatments helped a little, but not much and not reliably. I was 37 before I realized I had PTSD and my bizarre unpredictable behavior was perfectly reasonable and perfectly predictable IN CONTEXT. But until I learned the context I was lost. It's 10 years later and I'm still uncovering pieces of the problem.

You can do it. But don't go beating a dead horse. If something isn't working for you, it might be time to either ask "why" or try something else.

[shadowpsykie]

I really don't have much to add that other people here have not already, and in Razsolo's case far more eloquently than I could, stated. ( MIGHT CONTAIN TRIGGERS FOR SELF HARM)



as someone who has had issues with depression and cutting for close to 15 years ( issues I am still dealing with) there are times I can feel a bought of depression coming on. there are times I can take steps to fight it. there are times I am not prepared, and times no preparation can defend against. But there are times I am able to say to myself "No. I won't let this happen." and that works. that would be a good day.

I think here, Matt is saying me can feel this depression coming on and is taking measures to fight it.

at least this is what I am getting from this

[psylynce]

I think I must be a really negative space right now because for me the whole situation seems rushed and doesn't give a fair picture of the time and effort one needs to put into dealing with chronic depression. At the risk of sounding terribly picky if he had switched the phrasing a bit to something like " I was in the grip of an overwhelming depression, but I made a plan and worked through it." I would feel more comfortable with the whole thing.

On a side note I did some calculations and I'm at 15 years too, and still working on things. Let us continue to find strength in comics and naughty fan fiction!

On a second side note many thanks to every single SD poster who makes this a safe space that I look forward to visiting everyday! Y'all rock!

[thatnickguy]

Depression doesn't mean you can't have "good days." Heck, I've struggled with depression most of my life, but when I'm not down? I'm a big, punny, joking nerd and goofball.

[psylynce]

Which is exactly how you come across in your delightful posts! Keep up the good and puny work!

[filthysize]

To me it reads mostly as a misdirection joke on the character. Since the 80s, the one thing that has defined a Daredevil book is the amount of really awful things that happens to Matt's life and his near-constant mental breakdowns dealing with them. When Waid took over, he made it his mission statement in interviews that it's going to be a light book and Matt's going to be a fun, happy, well adjusted guy. But now some really bad things are happening, and I think Waid's poking fun at the fans who thought that they're getting Sad Matt again. "Nope. Over it."

[philippos42]

That's one thing I like about this. I get that DD has been Marvel's grim mystery man for a long time, and it's part of the trademark, but how many times can a character go to the same wells?

[drexer]

Matt shoots off his stick and Kristen goes 'Wow'.

Yep, seems pretty straightforward to me.

Secret Identity?

[hyperanthropos]

I have not been following the Daredevil-series latley, so this scans confuse me.
Does Matt no longer have a secret identity. 'Cause this stunt with those two muggers is bit of a give-away.

Re: Secret Identity?

[dragonbat2006]

He was outed a while back in the press. Paper later printed a retraction, but people generally assume that he is or think that he might be. They also assume that if he is, he's faking blindness as his cover. A few people know the truth absolutely. Foggy. And now Kirsten. Matt categorically denies it when the subject comes up.

Re: Secret Identity?

[nate_abril96]

He does but he doesn't. He always claims that he's not Daredevil and sometimes even disproves them, but pretty much the tabloids and most of New York aren't falling for it.

Re: Secret Identity?

[crabby_lioness]

It's a classic lawyer's stunt: "If I haven't admitted it or it hasn't been proven in court it's not true." I adore Waid for showing Matt using lawyer dodges.