Superman/Wonder Woman and the importance of keeping your flowers oiled

[alschroeder3]

Not really a fan of the Superman/Wonder Woman romance. I like Superman better relating to NORMAL people, desperately wanting to fit in with normal people, and the idea of him having a relationship with an Amazonian princess/demigoddess with magical powers strikes me as odd. I would have preferred to see a Wonder Woman/Orion relationship (god-mindset in common, rage issues, both warriors) as the creators of the recent run of Wonder Woman had originally planned...and Superman still in a relationship with Lois.

However, collecting entries for my KRYPTONIAN BESTIARY Tumblr, we've had a pretty cracktastic recent story ("Metamorphosis", Superman/Wonder Woman #12) that is not without some interesting insight into their relationship...

Before the SUPERMAN: DOOMED storyline, Clark gave Diana a present...a cutting from a Kryptonian flower.

Boy, he really is farmer Jonathan Kent's son, isn't he? Giving a plant as a gift...to a woman who would probably prize more an ancient Greek sword.

I love the "Oh, Clark. If I wanted smooth..."

So, Wonder Woman leads a pretty busy life. She doesn't have a lot of time inbetween battling Olympian baddies and Justice League missions. So she missed pouring cooking oil on the flower. What's the worst that can happen?

THIS.

Supes has a beard from returning from the Doomed! storyline, where he didn't have a mirror to shave with, in case you're wondering.

And if you think the plant metamorphosized from a beautiful flower to a vagina-detenta nightmare, you and I think alike. See my entry on the "oilplant" in the aforementioned Bestiary, which also shows various stages of its metamorphosis.

The plant starts sucking all the oil it can find, growing larger and larger, and is about to disrupt the world's supply of oil by overwhelming a major oil platform and pipeline, when Supes mentioned he would have appreciated a day, an afternoon, of pleasantries--but Diana "couldn't remember to give the plant a little cooking oil once in a while".

Diana does NOT take that lying down; his remark sparks THIS:

I actually kind of like this. Anybody who's been in a relationship knows that the biggest fights are usually about the stupidest stuff, something petty and relatively unimportant that gets blown out of proportion by both parties.

As it turns out, they had someone egging them on, in the person of Eris/Strife of the Olympians.

Superman, in the meantime, gets Swamp Thing to mellow the plant out and return it to its original state, although the returning Wonder Woman had to convince Swamp Thing that although if humanity was deprived of its oil addiction, it might be a better ecology, but humankind would probably erupt in war instead.

Afterwards, both apologize, and Superman wonders if it was ALL Strife, and WW admits, "Most of it. There is one part I meant, very much."

WW than is surprised when Superman doesn't want to return the plant to the Fortress, but wants her to keep it. She expresses doubts, but he says, "Whatever happens...we're ready."

I must admit, there is more of an equal-footing back-and-forth between Supes and Wonder Woman than there usually was between Supes and Lois. I still think their attraction is mainly physical, not a matching of personalities, but this shows...promise.

Considering we're talking about "oiling" a "flower"--and the nightmare the flower metamorphosized into---am I being too dirty-minded thinking this might be a metaphor for something else? Or have I been staring at too many Georgia O'Keefe paintings?

I STILL think she would have preferred a sword, though.

Comments

Super-Dickery!

[7dialsmystery]

Nice to know Lois isn't the only girlfriend Clark is a dick to.

um.....

[draganoche]

You do know what a 'sword' is a common metaphor for right?

Re: um.....

[alschroeder3]

Sure. But most weapons are phallic in shape (lariats being an exception) and she IS an amazon.

[althechi]

Flowers are already a metaphor for sex, because that's literally all they're fore Some people take this to extremes, though (warning: Pink Floyd -- The Wall).

Also, what's up with Diana's expression in the splash panel? It's like she's thinking Clark's face looks particularly tasty. o_0

I have to admit

[chortles81]

Reading the Finch Wonder Woman vs. Swamp Thing panels was just WEIRD after seeing the treatment of Swamp Thing in this issue.

[crinos]

Okay, so you give a woman a flower which turns into a monster if you don't give it oil regularly, you don't tell her WHY you need to give it oil, you just tell her she needs to, then when she misses doing it, you get MAD at her.

Here's a thought Clark. Maybe don't give your girlfriend a present THAT COULD KILL HER.

I mean Hell, at least the guy who bought the Mogwai in Gremlins had the excuse that he didn't know what would happen if you broke the rules. Don't give people a present that requires constant maintenance to keep it from KILLING PEOPLE, and if you must, TELL THEM THE CONTEXT. And sure as fuck don't get mad at them when they don't do the thing and the present goes berserk.

You shit head.

[althechi]

Well, it's apparently all Eris's fault. This time.

[deepspaceartist]

Clarks says right there on the scanned pages that he didn't know that it would turn into a monster if not oiled regularly. He thought it was justa pretty alien plant that lived off of oil instead of water. Presumably he always remembers to oil the original plant in the fortress, or has some sort of automated system set up.

[icon_uk]

Still doesn't excuse his behaviour towards Diana.

[crinos]

Yeah, but the Eris crap kind of does.

So Clark gets off the hook.... this time.

Still, I wonder what it must be like for SWORD when they check baggage of visiting aliens for fruit and such to prevent stuff like this.

[donnblake]

"Considering we're talking about "oiling" a "flower"--and the nightmare the flower metamorphosized into---am I being too dirty-minded thinking this might be a metaphor for something else? Or have I been staring at too many Georgia O'Keefe paintings?"

So you think Clark wanted Diana to stay at home and masturbate more?

[alschroeder3]

No, I'm thinking the WRITER might have been using it as a metaphor. I don't think Clark consciously thought anything---except that he was a farmer's son, and thought giving someone something that you can grow and tend to-- was what HE thought was a really nice, thoughtful gift.

Which is one of those things that makes me wonder if he really gets Diana. OTOH, I know I've given gifts to my wife that fell flat. Sometimes you give gifts to someone because YOU'D really like it, and you just assume they think the same way you do.

I thought it was revealing that Diana assumed he would be taking it back to his Fortress, and his insisting on her keeping it. I REALLY wonder how much she wanted it.

Physically, they're a perfect match for each other, and other scenes this issue showed some definite heat between the two. It must be nice to be able to hold someone without worrying you could lose control and maim or kill the other person in your passion. But if someone depowered both, you'd have a Kansas-raised reporter and an Amazon warrior princess from an ancient semi-Greek culture. At least Steve Trevor is a warrior/soldier. At least Lois is a reporter and writer.

But CAN they break up now that they have a regular book together? While Superman's Girl Friend, Lois Lane was published, there was no way to permanently usurp the Superman/Lois relationship. We're in a similar "locked in" relationship now. I suppose they COULD have adventures together even after breaking up, but it'd be pretty awkward.

[ozaline]

That Awkwardness could be enjoyable in and of itself if done right.

I'm actually kinda like the Clark/Diana relationship (especially in future Elseworlds, but not ones by Frank Miller), but I'd read a book about the two trying to figure out how to work together as just friends.

[big_daddy_d]

I try not to be that type that looks too much into everything and yet...got some... sexist..."old school women's roles" undertone here. That makes me uncomfortable.

[night4345]

Which part?

[dr_archeville]

So here's what I don't get: if it prefers cooking oil, why does it go after oil (that is, petroleum) reserves if it doesn't get an adequate supply? Other than both being called "oil," the two substances are completely different -- cooking oils are not petroleum products.

[alschroeder3]

GREAT point. Maybe cooking oil keeps it stable, suppresses its appetite for the petroleum-kind of oil, but if it doesn't get it, it craves the petroleum kind? (Sort of like the difference between the craving for food and drug addiction, how they can be two different substances altogether?) I dunno; I may be (by default) the world's greatest semi-expert on the wonky world of Kryptonian biology but I do know a lot of it takes a LOT of after-the-fact rationalization.

[richardak]

This is pretty stupid to begin with. Why would the Kryptonians have domesticated a plant like this in the first place? Why would they have wanted such a dangerous plant in their homes? And how would such a plant ever come to exist? Did it rain oil on Krypton? Did the plant's roots go down deep enough to get oil from the ground? How does this make any sense?

On an aesthetic note, wow, Superman's new costume is hideous. What is the point of all those unnecessary lines? Why does Superman need armor? And put his hair back in the S-curl, for pity's sake!

Finally, yes, I think the "flower" turning into a monster when not "oiled" is a pretty obvious metaphor, but a stupid one. This relationship does not work at all.

[jekylls_salvation]

No yeah, that is a vagina monster. I've seen one before. Watchmen.