Meet the New 'New Warriors'

[cyberghostface]

Screentime

A Meme-Obsessed super teen whose brain became connected to the internet after becoming exposed to his grandfather’s “experimental internet gas.” Now he can see augmented reality and real-time maps, and can instantly Google any fact. Does this make him effectively a genius? He sure acts like it does.




Snowflake and Safe Space

Psychic Twins. “All twins are psychic, but we’re psychic-er.” Snowflake, a cryokinetic, can materialize snowflake-shaped shuriken projectiles for throwing. Safespace can materialize pink forcefields, but he can’t inhabit them himself, the reflex only works if he’s protecting others. They’re hyper aware of modern culture and optics, and they see their Super Heroics as “a post-ironic meditation on using violence to combat bullying.” They're probably streaming this.



B-Negative

A teen “living vampire” exposed to Michael Morbius’s blood as a child in a rogue, but life-saving medical procedure. He still ages like a regular kid, but has all the abilities of Morbius. He’s also obsessed with all the music and attitude of a “classic” long-past decades like the '90s, and the '00s. “The world is a vampire…and so am I.”



Trailblazer

A regular kid scooped up into the world of teenage Super Heroing. Her “magic backpack” is actually a pocket dimension with seemingly infinite space, from which she can pull out useful or random objects—it’s not always under her control. She claims to get her power from god, but “not the god you’re thinking of.”

More info here.

Comments

[rainspirit]

These names are... so awkward...

I can't tell if it's supposed to be baiting the Millennials or the Gen Z. They're too young to be in their 30's. Does this appeal to anyone?

[t209]

Assuming if it was in-universe.
You know government representatives--mostly old and out of touch--trying to appeal to younger people on their awful laws.

[super_fly]

How Do You Do, Fellow Kids: The Comic

[cyberghostface]

I was tempted to have that as the cut tag lol.

[shadowseeking]

Oh boy...
Just when I thought that "The New Warriors become Pro-Registration lackeys" was bad enough, this arrives.

[thanekos]

his grandfather’s “experimental internet gas.”

Screentime's grandfather's motivation: " What if I could do the Internet as whippets? "

[mastermahan]

"The internet is a series of tubes! Filled with internet gas!"

[nyadnar17]

This is cringe.....like grade A cringe right here. I really hope its on purpose.

[starwolf_oakley]

It could be "This is going to get very dated very fast."
Which is an example of doing it on purpose while trying to follow the curve.

[lordultimus]

By the by, Snowflake is supposed to be non-binary. That makes that name a rather poor choice.

Also, those twins are Lannnister-close on the cover.

[kamino_neko]

I can get behind Trailblazer actually.

Snowflake and Safespace could be salvaged with some tweaks - starting with the names, ugh...they're too far gone even to use ironically. (He's basically Steven Universe, which amuses me.)

Screentime and B-Negative...the right writer using them in a humorous story could probably make them work (paging Gail Simone).

</End positivity>

From the way the descriptions are worded, though, it doesn't sound like the writer is planning to use them in a way that would work.

[panthyr]

Dunno, Trailblazer's a little too "Dora the Explorer becomes a Teenager".

[kamino_neko]

Now I get the 'Latina with pink top and magic bag' objection to her (I'm WAY too old and non-parent-y for Dora to be high enough in my mind to get the reference without it being pointed out explicitly).

But, you know, I still have no problem with it. If intentional*, it's obtuse enough a reference to not really be distracting, and...well, it's the kind of silliness that I enjoy existing in even serious superhero stuff.

* Which, thinking about it, it basically has to be. Trailblazer<->Explorer? Can't see that being an accident, and I was having trouble figuring out the significance of the name before that.

[nightauditguy]

So this would be the New New New New(?) Warriors?

[scorntx]

New New New New New New New Warriors.

[owlbrigade1]

Is this tumblr fanart of She-Ra and the Princesses of Power? I expect better of my tumblr fanart.

[icon_uk]

This is Luciano Vecchio, who did art on Ironheart, and whose work I've always liked, to the extent of comissioning him, twice so far!

D&D

[akodo_aoshi]

I am probably showing my age here but reading the description of Trailblazer's ability....

Is anyone getting a flash back of Presto from the (Old) Dungeons and Dragons Cartoon?

Re: D&D

[icon_uk]

Showing MY age, this (and Presto) both have elements of Felix the Cat and his "Bag of Tricks"

[informationgeek]

So is Trailblazer Native American, because if so... not sure if the writer thought that through.

[silverhammerman]

I’ve seen this announcement catching a lot of flack, primarily for Snowflake and Safespace. The other ones could skate by as being a bit cringe inducing, but those two cross the line into feeling a little offensive. I think Kibblesmith is a conscientious writer and he’s attempting to be cute and challenging, but it feels real tone deaf.

Overall these characters feel very prefabricated and disposable. Nothing about them seems particularly interesting individually, they’re just “Zoomer team”, which likely speaks to their role in the upcoming series.

[mesmiranda]

I think Kibblesmith is a conscientious writer and he’s attempting to be cute and challenging, but it feels real tone deaf.

I didn't even register that this was Kibblesmith! He's usually better than this--that's a cherry on top of the suspiciously brown, smelly sundae.

[beyondthefringe]

I fuckin' love these kids. They're beyond ridiculous and yet so very... pointed.
I suspect Kibblesmith (how is that even a real name?) is deliberately baiting people with this team, these codenames, these tropes. I know he claims that the kids have chosen these names in an ironic fashion, but as a writer, he's clearly trying to either make a point, or signal that something's not entirely right here.

Maybe they're a team of Skrulls sent undercover by Hulking to infiltrate the hero community before Empyre kicks off.

If nothing else... They're no sillier than a millionaire black guy who fights crime with a skateboard or a super-bouncy guy named after drugs or an angry black guy whose power is that he's a super-strong angry black guy because the '90s were super non-subtle. :)

[tcampbell1000]

Yeah, let's be real: if you pitched a superhero team with the name "New Warriors" to anyone not familiar with the original, they'd assume you were either out of ideas or trolling somebody. "Night Thrasher?" "Speedball?" "Rage?"

Context matters a lot, and given the timing of these guys' introductions, I suspect they're supposed to be cringey. Not that that fixes everything, but I"m willing to see how this plays on the page.

[icon_uk]

Yeah, critiquing The New Warriors, of all teams, for bizarre name choices seems to be verlooking their long, long history of bizarre name choices, as Microbe and Debrii would also agree

[kamino_neko]

Yeah...the only names I object to, here, are Safespace and Snowflake, just because I really can't get over the asshole use of them to even like them used ironically.

I actually think B-Negative is kind of a clever pun.

[icon_uk]

So would his evil twin be B-Positive, the upbeat, cheery vampire?

[crinos]

I like these characters, I like the designs.

But some of those fucking names. Snowflake? Safe Space? I'm surprised they didn't work "Trigger Warning" and "Social Justice Warrior" in there while they were at it.

But as someone whose planning on writing a crossover super hero fanfic about teen heroes shortly after Steven Universe wraps up. Fuck it, bring em on.

[lordultimus]

New Warriors... Social Justice Warriors... You may be on to something.

[crinos]

Well I mean, Is Trauma still around from the Initiative? That kid whose power was he could turn into your worst fear? I could see him in there with the nickname Trigger Warning. I mean that's literally his super power.

Come to think of it it was also Dani Moonstar's power. Did she ever get her powers back after M day?

[icon_uk]

Yes, she did, she'd had access to her Valkyrie powers for a while, but at some point last year she seemed to haveher Emotional Trauma Arrow power back and it was just sort of handwaved away that they were just back, somehow...

[crinos]

exposing yet another flaw in the intensely stupid M Day idea.

"Hey I want to use this mutant for my story....Oh they were depowered by M Day? Okay then ummm.... they just have their power back. Because reasons."

Honestly considering the whole Krakoa thing I kind of assume that M Day has been largely undone by this point anyway.

[scorntx]

-Because reasons-

The power of Just Not Giving A Damn can be used for neutral purposes, as well as evil.

[lego_joker]

I've long held that superheroes, as a whole, have no business existing in the Internet age except as over-the-top parodies. Looking at this, I'd be lying if I said I didn't feel a little jolt of vindication.

[ap0cryphal]

brb having a flashback to nick spencer's New Mexican American Falcon, Featuring TRIGGER WARNINGS and SAFE SPACES and SOCIAL JUSTICE EXTREMISTS and Totally Not Ann Coulter

who is this even for

[sarahnewlin]

Wait whst?

[ap0cryphal]

i wish i were kidding

https://www.bleedingcool.com/2017/01/04/marvels-ann-coulter-vs-safe-space-terrorists-todays-captain-america/

[t209]

Well, Spencer was an establishment toady.
He even blamed Bernie Sanders for 2016 fiasco and seems to have dim view on progressive.
Wouldn't be surprised since he himself was a politician.
No offense but I understand if anyone had criticism on Bernie, but Spencer do tend to cozy with politicians alot.

[icon_uk]

I can understand that reaction, but thankfully, I'm not quite so worried.

Nick Spencer long since lost the right to any benefit of the doubt about such things.

These guys though, I'll wait and see.

Daniel Kibblesmith is a comedian and writer (Who wrote "Santa's Husband" and for Stephen Colbert) and Luciano Vecchio is an openly out gay man, so I think they are aware of the spaces they risk encroaching into.

[akodo_rokku]

This announcement has brought Comicsgaters and actual thinking caring people together in shitting on it, which is something I never thought could be done.

[icon_uk]

I'm going to reserve judgement until I see the actual issue, but I find this TOO deliberate a combination of over-trendiness and Golden Age insanity* to be anything other than a ruse.

I mean, c'mon, "Internet gas" is right up there with "mongoose blood"/"hard water fumes" causing super-speed and being able to fly because you were raised by condors who taught you how to flap REALLY hard?

That, and I'm a fan of Luciano Vecchio's style and super-bright colour choices.

[malitia]

This is bait.

So I reserve judgement until we see the actual issue.

[t209]

Just hope that the real comic might EXPLAIN THE NAMES.
I mean this is just a preview and maybe it might be FORCED by the government--or at least some old idiots--to make it "palatable" with youths.
Maybe also tongue-in-cheek against Marvel editorials, who for some reason feel like "old coot" despite being a powerhouse among Generation X.

[tripodeca113]

These seem like mean-spirited parodies,but they're real.

I suspect they'll fallout of the public eye in a few years,then show up years later for a mocking cameo.