Superior #2

[superboyprime]

Comments

[destroyed]

Or maybe his Dad brought it home from work as a surprise? You guys try way too hard to be cynical about Millar. Granted, this likely *won't* end well, but don't get all Comic Book Guy and pick on the man for bits and pieces.

Using the name of CSI isn't "trying WAY too hard to be relevant." Maybe he just digs CSI. It also shows that the kid is into police drama, and as such likely somewhat moral/just.

Same with Hit Girl's hello Kitty backpack, and one of you being a tool about maybe one of the only times we're reminded she's still somewhat of a little lady at heart. Geez.

[psychopathicus_rex]

OK, so he brought it home as a surprise. So why isn't he going 'surprise!'? Either he's already showed it to the kid and the kid knows about it, or he hasn't and he doesn't. Either way, it doesn't work - you don't spring a surprise on someone that way, and you don't talk about something you already know is there that way. It's clumsy writing.
And yes, perhaps I am nitpicking a bit, but I can't help it - it's a detail that bugs me.

[destroyed]

People can be subtle, you know. My parents never shouted "SURPRISE!" like goofy douchebags. It's more surprising on casual mention because you get that double take effect.

Maybe I'm granting too much leeway because it reminded me of my folks, but it's not unheard of.

[psychopathicus_rex]

I'm not saying they SHOULD be going "SURPRISE!" - I agree, that would be stupid - it's just that one of the cardinal dictates of good fiction is 'show, don't tell', and this applies here just as it would in real life. If the father wants to surprise his kid, something along the lines of 'hey, look what I picked up', followed by showing him the item in question, would be much more effective then just saying 'hey, why don't we blah blah blah' while the kid is feeling down and unresponsive. This is all presupposing it IS a surprise; if it isn't, then it's the equivalent of going 'hey, it's dinnertime, time for dinner, which we shall eat at the dinner table on plates while we sit on chairs.' The kid KNOWS all that; he doesn't have to have it told to him. It's too much exposition in fictional terms, and it doesn't ring true in real-life terms.