Worm Fox Priest Sex Vibes?!: JUSTICE LEAGUE EUROPE #24-25 (JLI 68)

[tcampbell1000]

Warning for some uncomfortable sexual symbolism. Keith Riffen, Ger-words Jones, bArt Sears.

Giffen’s Justice League plots are never boring, but this story feels extra unhinged, its elements strung together more by Freudian associations than his usual grounded, working-class perspective. It wouldn’t surprise me to learn the production process involved a six-pack of story dice and some of the more stimulating drugs.

Let’s recap. The Brown Comma, sorry, “Crimson Fox” is actually twins, Constance and Vivian. Both have sworn vengeance on their parents’ killer/employer Puanteur, a CEO of the perfumier company Revlo-- Revson. Their parents’ pheromone experiments gave the twins pheromone powers. Maybe some modest strength and speed enhancements too? It’s unclear. Maybe those enhancements explain how they can use their costume’s twelve-inch fingernail-claws without breaking half the bones in their hands?



Having staged Constance’s death, the twins trade off between being the Fox and being “Vivian D’Aramis,” a big-league CEO who took over Revson and grew it via mergers and acquisitions. Sensible, disciplined Constance is better at being this “Vivian” than the saucy, impetuous real Vivian. Seems like maybe they “killed off” the wrong sister for the sake of their cover, but anyway.



Puanteur has gone underground rather than face accusations of murder. And from there, he’s done what any disgraced CEO would do: become a cult leader and get into controlling giant worms via tuning forks.



How did he--or the cult before him--discover these worms? How does the tuning fork control them well enough to target individual buildings? How have these worms remained hidden under Great Britain this long, despite their immense destructive potential and the cavernous tunnels they create?

Answers will not be forthcoming. Giant worms. Just accept it.

I'll say this for Puanteur, though: he is an excellent portrayal of a charismatic man going mad from the sheer intensity of his hatred. While the JLE investigate said worms through said tunnels, Constance-as-Vivian gets a rude awakening.





Can...can he control ALL plants like this? Because that seems WAY more practical as a means of destroying buildings and killing people than this tuning-fork-and-giant-worms stuff. Maybe it's just the one tree in his backyard that he's trained really well. I hear talking to them helps.

Cap and the others engage one worm in combat, but none of their attacks on its exterior work. The only thing that does is a maneuver Captain Atom improvises, after one of the worms eats Metamorpho and finds him indigestible. 💩





Puanteur and his cult have secured Constance to the top of a Revson plant, while the JLE discover more giant worms under the earth--lots more. They’re dormant for now, but any attack on one could agitate the rest. The Silver Sorceress could zap them into limbo, but only one at a ti--






You know, the design of Puanteur’s head, by itself, would probably have been phallic enough.



The worms lay waste to the Revson plant, but…



Vivian is more the flirt than Constance, but the way Constance sports with Wally here isn’t an error. This issue will emphasize that the two sisters are not so different at heart. It's more that Constance maintains an exterior personality of responsibility and reserve...a superego, as Freud would say...that Vivian doesn't bother with.

The JLE heads off to deal not only with the worms, but with a cloud of chemicals released by the plant’s destruction. That’ll keep them busy while we focus on the Foxes and the defining moment of their lives.*






Yeah, he's still got the two sisters mixed up. He won't live to regret the error.




Maurice runs out of ammunition and then runs out of the woods, back to the fork. “Don’t panic…not over…” he mumbles. “I still have the greatest weapon…I still have the worms!”




The worms are doomed, dissolving in the sun faster than slugs in…well, we’ve had enough gross imagery for today. Smythe, who stole the clapper when Maurice wasn’t looking, now takes charge of the cult and resolves to lead it back to the ancient ways--the ways of humility and self-denial. The JLE celebrates a rare easy win. Although Cap snaps at the Crimson Fox for breaking ranks, Constance-as-Vivian testifies that Fox was just protecting her. Which is true enough, as far as it goes.

*Was there an unsatisfactory and depressing sequel to this tale years later, in Justice League America #103-104? Unfortunately, it’s impossible for anyone to count issue numbers that high, so we can never be sure. Suffice to say that--while we have a couple more stories and cameos that will feature them--this revenge arc is as good as it got for Crimson Fox fans.

Neither sister made it to the 21st century. A third Crimson Fox surfaced for a while, somehow inheriting their fortune and exhibiting the same abilities, but faded into obscurity before she could explain herself. Below: her sole spotlight appearance.



So here’s to you, ladies. À votre santé. Your powers were cringe, your costume was ridiculous, your closeups were often unflattering, your name made no sense, and on panel, you mostly used your CEO power to popularize yourselves. But maybe you spoke to some part of the collective nerd unconscious that more respectable superheroes couldn’t address. At the very least, you were unique.



Vivian: Merci, mon cher Monsieur Recappeur! Alors, I see your series is about to reach soixante-neuf! (giggle) To celebrate, voulez-vous coucher avec nous ce soir?
Constance: Vivian! Of course he wouldn’t! [pause] …Unless…?

No! I’m married! Stop making this weird! Ugh, never mind!

The JLE return to their base to find Kilowog on the verge of leaving. “It’s no big shaboola. I just gotta do a favor f’r a brudder alien.” Before they can ask him to repeat that in English, they see they have a guest getting ready to accompany him. This guest is a jovial human…with a starfish on his face.

Saturday: Which is the greater menace: Starro or G’Nort?

Comments

[metadronos]

Must... resist... making... "Clap on/ Clap off"... joke... Wait, I just did. Sorry.

And hey, Monsieur Recappeur, don't feel guilty about imagining an evening with the Angry Brown Comma twins. Unless you go by Jimmy Carter's "adultery in my heart" thing, it doesn't count as infidelity. 😇