Superdickery 1992: Superman’s Brief, Hostile Takeover of the JLA (JLE 36, JLS 1, JLA 61-67/JLI 91)

[tcampbell1000]

Fans always wondered what would happen if the “bwa-ha-ha” Justice League added Superman to the roster. Would he be a powerhouse straight man, letting the team reach new heights of comedy AND action? Would he get to relax and loosen up a bit?

Or would he glare his disapproval at everyone for eight issues and then die of embarrassment?

After “Breakdowns” came a couple of bizarre follow-ups. In Justice League Europe #36, all fifteen remaining Leaguers resign within about ninety minutes of each other, even the ones who reaffirmed their commitment in JLA #60.

Gerard Jones does his best to make this look like an organic, character-driven plot instead of editorial fiat. He presents it as a cascade failure of morale following the toll taken in “Breakdowns,” with each resignation…and one last humiliating defeat…eroding the remaining Leaguers’ esprit de corps until there’s nothing left. But put the issues side by side and there are still some jarring disconnects in characterization.





Max and Oberon end up standing alone in the JLA cave like a couple of goobers.




For you, Max, I’m afraid the answer is “downhill fast.”

(General Glory doesn’t even get a departure scene, just a line of dialogue from Catherine: “General Glory has quit.” Seems like he's the LAST PERSON who would ditch a hero group with "America" in the name, but maybe he couldn’t handle a French woman yelling at him. “D-didn’t we save them in the war?”)



The real reason for this abrupt, complete dissolution becomes clearer when you know readers were voting on League membership, so nobody was guaranteed a spot in the new lineup. Every single departing member acts like they’re quitting for good and forever.

Ten of them team right back up in Justice League Spectacular #1, less than one month later. Nothing out of the ordinary pulls them out of retirement, it’s just the dang Royal Flush Gang armed with weapons above their pay grade, AGAIN. Dan Jurgens (co-writer, co-artist), Gerard Jones (co-writer), and Ron Randall (co-artist).



And Max is secretly funding them to get the League’s attention, AGAIN.



Same move he pulled in Justice League #4, tying in with Booster Gold and…wasn’t that crossover the last time Jurgens dealt with Max? Did…did he just think Max hadn’t been through any important changes since then? (Besides apparently getting a lot dumber?)




The difference is this time a different villain is supplying the weapons, so Max’s attempt to rig an easy win for “his team” turns into an insurrection that even captures Superman.



The RFG’s “Holy shit, we WON?” reaction is one of the few genuinely funny bits in this comic. At other times, the fact that it was a rush job in response to those reader votes is all too evident:



“…Ralph, you’re STILL QUIPPING. I’m asking you if anyone’s DEAD out there! GOOD GOD.”

After the fighting’s done, the “classic heroes” talk among themselves and decide they’re going to give the League what it needs to persevere. Because when you think of responsible leadership, you think of Hal Jordan, Aquaman, and that guy who kept promising to help out in emergencies and then never showed up.



Superman spends zero seconds interacting with any of the Leaguers that he assumes he’ll now be leading. Just look at how lost he looks in the issue’s closing splash spread, like he’s trying to figure out how he even got there:



In Justice League America #61, Superman decides any business execs with L initials are gonna TAKE THE L while he’s around. (Blanked out a few distracting captions here, they're not important.)



“Ours,” Superman? You’ve been a member for like FIVE MINUTES. Max Lord has fought for the League’s UN sanction, organized recruitment, courted the press, managed logistics, balanced books, PAID SALARIES. He was SHOT in its service--TWICE! He nearly died THREE OR FOUR TIMES! Literally ONE ISSUE BEFORE THIS, he was borderline SUICIDAL because he’d been used against the League!



I shouldn’t have to be yelling this stuff at him, Oberon! YOU should be yelling it!



Here, ask Ice, she was the one who couldn’t stop crying the last time Max was in the hospital--



Wait, Ice, what are you…?



So, to sum up: Superman hates Maxwell Lord because Max is a worthless parasite treating the League as a “toy” to feed his ego [citation needed]. Ice now loves Superman, so she now hates Max too. Up to now, Fire’s been a friend to Max, but now she thinks Ice dumping on Max is great because Ice’s Super-stanning might kill her romance with Guy. And Oberon acts like it’s Max’s fault for not being likable. Are we sure THIS isn’t Max’s villain origin?

Max does demonstrate his value exactly once in the post-Giffen era. That's in issue #63, when he rolls out the team’s new headquarters. We’ll discuss more of his “development” later, but at this point Jurgens shifts from assassinating Max’s character to assassinating…Superman’s??

I mean, Supes wasn’t exactly warm and cuddly in that earlier scene, but at least there, he was advocating for what he saw as his teammates' best interests. But now we learn he’s the kind of “leader” who takes off for days, cannot be reached, and yet takes offense when people make decisions without him. Guess he expects “his” team to just, I don’t know, hang out at a McDonald’s or something until he gets around to visiting. (There are a couple of new faces in the pages below: I'll discuss them next time.)





Absenteeism and pettiness aren’t the only things Superman has to offer this League. There’s also withering contempt! I mean, here's how he responds when he wants to depose a tyrant on planet Almerac and the other Leaguers don't immediately fall into line:




True, most of Superman’s ire goes toward Booster, with whom he’s had a bad history, and toward Guy Gardner, who is Guy Gardner. But most of the others don’t seem that much better in his eyes: “UGH, there goes Beetle telling HARMLESS JOKES again and Fire CARING ABOUT HOW SHE LOOKS. How many times do I have to tell these Leaguers what their own League stands for before it sinks in?”

As soon as they get to Almerac, this happens:





Guy would, as it turns out, NOT come back--he’d only catch up with the team after they found another way home. Now, sure, Guy is a lot, and Ice isn’t helping, but Superman has to take some blame for letting THEIR ONLY PATH BACK TO EARTH slip away. There are multiple ways to handle a guy like Guy, but Superman seems dead set on replicating Batman’s approach. Which works about as well as every other time he tries to be Batman.

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When Guy does come back, Superman only accepts him back into the League because Batman tells him to. No, really. Also, the Atom is there (#66).




In #67, Atom sticks around long enough to grouse about how this League isn't like the old League. Then he shrinks off, never to be seen in this title again. His tenure is kind of like Hawkman's, only much more efficient!

Thursday: Hey, at least things got a little better between Supes and the League before he died, right? Sure! After three rounds with Doomsday, he didn’t have the ENERGY to keep scowling at them.

Comments

[cainofdreaming]

“Ours,” Superman? You’ve been a member for like FIVE MINUTES. Max Lord has fought for the League’s UN sanction, organized recruitment, courted the press, managed logistics, balanced books, PAID SALARIES. He was SHOT in its service--TWICE! He nearly died THREE OR FOUR TIMES! Literally ONE ISSUE BEFORE THIS, he was borderline SUICIDAL because he’d been used against the League!

Yeah, but none of that happened under Jurgens. So it didn't happen.

[iamrman]

And people thoight I was kidding when I said Superman decreed that there would be no fun.

[scorntx]

I didn't think you was kidding. I just didn't think it'd be quite so... this.

[blues32]

Guy not only didn't come back, he didn't get to keep his ring.

[metadronos]

Okay, part of me says Guy's side is the last side I should be taking, but WHAT THE HELL, ICE? Superman gives Max one "back off, buster" speech, and suddenly your entire history with Guy means nothing? All the times you stood up for him when no one else would, when Guy himself, due to his lingering insecurity, wouldn't? That time he finally let his ego barrier down and admitted his love for you? You're just going to chuck all that because ooh, isn't Superman so dreamy telling off Max? And what good will that do you? Haven't you heard of Lois? You think Superman's going to leave her for you, whom he barely knows?

Wait, calm down, metadronos. You have the (admittedly limited, if not perilously close to solipsistic) power of personal head canon. Use it! So: I hereby ignore this gross mischaracterization of Ice. Neither DeMatteis nor Giffen ever write her this way. Therefore, I pretend it didn't happen. Ice loves Guy. Even when he's a jerk. Because that's what Ice does. Because that's who she is.

[tcampbell1000]

The idea of Ice being hot for Superman isn't terrible, by itself! If you asked "Which superhero do superheroines most often fantasize about," Superman would have to top the list, wouldn't he? (In Marvel, I figure it's more of a split between Captain America and Thor.)

Most of his colleagues don't know about Lois (except for that stretch where he didn't have a secret identity), so he could be single as far as they know, and even knowing he was married wouldn't stop some crushes from forming.

The problem is, Jurgens' Ice is mostly an airhead, and a passive one unless she can exacerbate tensions by being extra dumb. It'd be one thing if she were torn between Guy and Superman. It'd be even better if she appealed to Guy's feelings for her and told him those poor, oppressed Almerackians needed a man's man like Guy to protect them. Doesn't ignore Guyce, Ice shows she's in Superman's corner, and the triangle simmers for a bit.

Instead, she acts like this is the first time she's MET Guy. "How DARE you speak to Superman so DISRESPECTFULLY?" Far as I can tell, Jurgens' idea here is that love is blind, and therefore Ice had put Guy on a pedestal until Superman knocked him off it. Seems...simplistic.

(Likewise, there's a version of the Max-Superman scene where Supes still comes charging in convinced that Lord is just Diet Luthor...until Oberon and Fire rise to Max's defense, Superman admits he was wrong in that way only he can, and THAT'S what gets Ice's crush-gears grinding. If there is one thing her relationship with Guy lacks, it is the idea that a man of conviction can listen to others and admit he's wrong. Okay, there's a lot of things it lacks, but still.)

Stare at any plot long enough and you start to see the ways it could be bettered. Or at least I do. It's like a Magic Eye, or it would be if I could work those.)

[tcampbell1000]

To clarify the above just a little...you are right that Ice "forgetting" she and Guy had declared their love for each other is not great or workable. Some kinda conflicting-feelings plot might be, but it'd have to at least ACKNOWLEDGE where they were as a couple.

[scorntx]

Whoof.
Much as there were certain aspects of the DeMatteis-Giffen style I wasn't wild about, still. That's a harsh tonal turn around.
It's not quite "slaughter half the team, throw a quarter of the remainder through a portal to fates unknown, leave the remainder demoralised" but still.

And what the crap's got into Superman? Did Jimmy steal all his donuts? Lex burn down every coffee shop in Metropolis?
"We're here at Justice League, where we've replaced Superman's characterisation with 90s Batman. Let's see if anyone notices..."

Almost expecting him to start breaking legs and tossing people out windows.

Mind, he's not the only one. "I'd get this team back on its feet by morning."
Psst, Hal, if you're going to do a Guy impersonation, drop some of your "g"s.
Unless you're serious. In which case, bad news bud. Of the founding JLAers, you're probably sixth choice. Seventh, if we're merciful and count Snapper Carr.

Ice's fangirling is kind of weird, too.
When Guy's pointing out you're acting odd and out of character, something's gone very wrong.

... Superman joins the League. Not five minutes later, here's Maxima.
Nuthin' suspicious there!

"We STAND for something, Booster! This League STANDS for certain IDEALS and RIGHTS! I'm not going to insult anyone's intelligence by reminding you what those IDEALS are, but by gum we stand for them!"

Can't tell if Guy going from agreeing with Superman to automatically throwing a fit because Supes told him to do something is meant to be intentional funny or just more manufactured arguments.
It's Guy. Could be either.


-Are we sure THIS isn't Max's villain origin?-
So many possible avenues for Max's 'turn' to villainy, rather than the ones we got.

Having something you helped create fall apart, being possessed by a monstrous supervillain and used as an accessory to murder and populicide, trying to rebuild your dream, only to then deal with Superman coming in and being a total dick.
People have snapped harder for less.

[tcampbell1000]

When Guy's pointing out you're acting odd and out of character, something's gone very wrong.

Can't argue.

[mazway_75]

This just showed how trying to make the JLI respectable after years treated as a joke was a rough shift. Also we're just skimming over stuff like Bloodwynd but likely for the best.

I forgot "white temple" Hal at the time. Whatever else about Johns, liked him explaining that away as Parallex influence.

What really looks strange to me? Beetle suddenly doing Spider-Man like poses. It's just...weird.

[tcampbell1000]

I hope that, if nothing else, this retrospective can argue the JLI was never quite "treated as a joke," or rather, that a joke was never all that it was. But I do agree that Giffen and DeMatteis had a one-of-a-kind sensibility and that ANYONE would have had a tough time following their act. The character choices Jurgens made still flabbergast me, though.

(Bloodwynd gets a brief mention or two in the next update, but yeah, you're not wrong about him either. And you couldn't pay me to talk about Weapons Master and Starbreaker.)

I started paying attention to Hal in his "white temple" period, so I had a sort of Mandela effect about how long that lasted. I'm sure it looks "wrong" to people who started reading Hal earlier or later, but I felt like it was just...normal aging? It hits some people at 30? I don't mind it getting revised out of existence so much (and I'm sure all-brown hair made him more marketable), but I feel like there had to be a more plausible way to do that than to say, "The magical fear-parasite that bonded with him and made him evil really likes that distinguished look."

I also agree about Beetle's posing. I think it's more of the general editorial push to have their cake and eat it too with Beetle...the people who liked the jokey League wanted him around; the people angling for something more operatic and grand...well, they wanted him gone, but they'd at least complain less if the stories kept showing him as intelligent and fit and cool. Not everyone read the story where he got back in shape, so Jurgens sent the message with the visuals: "Look! See? He's an acrobat, acrobatting!"

[thanekos]

Parallax-induced greying is at least a fun riff on " sudden fear turns your hair white ".

[tcampbell1000]

True.

[blues32]

As opposed to Hal wanting to try the Reed Richards look, I guess.

[zylly]

Offff, I always forget just how rough that transition is. Nothing was ever going to be quite like the JLI as previously defined, but this is such a weird mix of wanting to use the majority of the same characters while also just shitting all over it as jokes (though certainly not as bad as other writers eventually would).

And I really dislike Clark, Arthur, and Hal’s “what they need is guidance/grown ups in charge” conference. It’s extremely dismissive, especially when people like Ralph, Rex, and Wally have had careers nearly as long as they have.

As Booster said at one point, “do you really think J’onn and Batman would have hung around so long if we were a joke?”

There are some highlights in this era, but eventually it really will become a mercy killing when Morrison comes in.

[beyondthefringe]

"In #67, Atom sticks around long enough to grouse about how this League isn't like the old League. Then he shrinks off, never to be seen in this title again. His tenure is kind of like Hawkman's, only much more efficient!"

Of course, we DO see Atom again, just a few issues later when the title takes a VERY dark turn into an altered reality where the League has gone full fascist, and I look forward to you covering that storyline if you choose to tackle it.