All-Star Batman vs Green Lantern

[skund]

chipsnopotatoes requested some ASBAR with Batman and Green Lantern, especially the yellow room.

I hope you're READY to be AWED by writing that is as BEAUTIFUL as it is SUBTLE. Because it is BEAUTIFUL. And SUBTLE. And BEAUTIFULLY SUBTLE. So be AWED.

HAHA, GREEN LANTERN can't find BATMAN and has to signal for him. Haha, what a MORON.

Ha, Green Lantern is eating a hot dog. I bet he has HIGH CHOLESTEROL as well as being STUPID.

Okay... there's seriously no commentary I can add to this to make it more eye-gougingly bad.

Then the next issue opens with...

Batman describing Dick as having "fast hands, big mouth" just pushes every single 'NO' button in my brain. D:

In another wall-o'text page Batman declares that yes, he's scaring people and Gotham's crime rate has never been better. Hal calls him a criminal, Bruce counters that they're all criminals and Hal slugs him one.

 

Rube = "an unsophisticated person from a rural area", circa 1900. That's... an interesting choice to put in the mouth of a modern twelve year old boy.

Oh come on, surely we can fit another 'Hal Jordan thinking really hard' panel on that page.

And to demonstrate just how mature and professional they are, Batman and Robin proceed to play keep-away with Hal's ring.

Dick then gets a tad too excited and crushes Hal's windpipe. Batman hauls him off the suffocating Lantern. And by haul him off I mean throw him into a wall and punch in in the face.

Batman and Robin leave just before the ambulance arrives. Bruce takes the crying, snot dripped Dick to the cemetery and the issue ends with them crying in each other's arms in the night rain between the graves of their parents.

Whisky.

Tango.

Foxtrot.
 

Tags: title: all-star batman and robin, char: batman/bruce wayne, char: robin/nightwing/dick grayson, char: green lantern/hal jordan, creator: frank miller, creator: jim lee

Comments

[punishermax]

Because, unfortunantly, that's what Miller is now. He's let his love for a character become so great he's become a fanfiction writer. It's like a kid who loves Harry Potter and makes him so awesome and cool and badass and all the other kids are dumb and losers and Harry has different colored eyes because he has the soul of Merlin and he's dating three girls and one of the girls is from America and she's totally not the author, but she looks like her and is sweet and nice and

[box_in_the_box]

You have been consistently awesome and correct throughout this thread.

[punishermax]

I found Frank Miller's script for the next Harry Potter book http://myimmortalrehost.webs.com/chapters122.htm

[box_in_the_box]

Tara Gilesbie doesn't use the word "goddamn" or have enough WHORESWHORESWHORES in her cast to be Frank Miller.

[punishermax]

But Harry's like Batman because he's dark and brooding and he's so rough with dark hair and oh god Bruce ugh...so close WHOOOOOORRRREEESSS

[aulayan]

Dont' forget MY PARENTS ARE DEAD!